100 Things Normal People Do NOT Understand

41: Don't Jump Out Of Windows!

ELLO!

I apologize, I had a Spanish SPEAKING test that I've been worked over.....

Btw for anyone who actually is fluent in Spanish, how good is this sentence?

Mi maestera es simpatica y castona pelo.

Eh eh??

(Probably has 1000 grammatical issues but :))

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*You're in class trying not to fall asleep and your teacher walks in.*

Teacher: EVERYONE HIT THE GROUNDS IT'S A LEVEL 3 LOCKDOWN DRILL!

*Everyone does for the floors and goes on their phones.*

Teacher: No phones! I SAID NO PHONES!

*The announcements come on.*

Announcer: THIS IS NOT A DRILL! IT'S NOT A DRILL! EVERYONE THE SHOOTER IS HER- *PEW PEW PEW DDRRRRR PEW!*

Class: Gasp It's Desiigner! PEW DRRRRR RAAAAAA PANDA PANDA PANDA DRRR RAA

*You tackle class.*

Class: MRH what?!

You: This isn't a drill and I kinda don't wanna die!

Teacher: Well I do to see you my angel... In heaven :)

You: More like looking down at you from heaven

(Note: I'm sorry if you don't believe in hevean/hell. If this is making you uncomfortable for any reason, please let me know.)

Class: OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Teacher: I hear footsteps, HURRY EVERYONE TAKE A WEAPON! GET SOMETHING SHARP!

Geovensia: Imma use my cat eyeliner! I mean its so fleeky and sharp like its identical too so I'm SHOOK AND-

*The door rattles and you don't have a weapon.*

You: I DON'T HAVE A WEAPON!

Class: THEN DIE! LET HER DIE LET HER DIE LET HER SHRIVEL UP AND DIE!

^The first person who can tell me where that's from will get me a follow bc I freakin' love that movie.

*You spot the window, but you're 8 floors up. The lock clicks open.*

Teacher: READY AIM-

You: BYE!

*You jump out of the window and get squished like a mosquito.*

*The door opens and Fred walks in.*

Fred: Someone ordered pizza?

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STORY TIME

This title is actually really funny to me....

So basically last year our teacher was explaining our Chicago trip. We all stalled him, but there was 20 minutes left.

So everyone stared at me like "STALL ITS YOUR TURN"

So I was like "Hey what happens if you get locked out and you have to jump out of a window but survive?" I know it was a really dumb question.

He stared at me for 90 seconds and I laughed nervously and then he was like "Hmm nice try stalling you're terrible."

And then on my report card, he wrote "Upgrade on the stall". My parents thought it meant I had to install Microsoft word and I wouldn't telll them what it means so they got crazy.

OK I KNOW THIS DOESN'T SOUND FUNNY BUT STILLL!! I am not a good story teller so forgive me..

If you made it this far thank you for putting up with this weird crap....