Abstinence

Chapter 32.

"The first meal I will teach is scrambled eggs. If you don't know how to make eggs I want you to stand up and walk out of this room right now." Chef Ray speaks staring around the room at his new class. I've decided to give this cooking class another go. I was interrupted the first time when I had to babysit Luke when Erika dropped him off at my doorstep. I can't continue to sit in the house all day and all night not having anything to do.

There are six more days until I can start working again. I feel like I'm counting down the days and hours until that Monday morning at 8:30 when I can go back into the office. I already rescheduled my appointments with my two patients, the only thing left for me to do is show up healthy.

I try to keep myself busy at home but without Hayden and work I feel so bored. There are not enough things to do in Wes' condo. I realize now without Hayden, I don't really have a life outside of work. Just about everything that I do revolves around him and as much as I love that and him, I don't necessarily think that's healthy. I don't have anything for myself besides my job and even that has something to do with Hayden.

"Your eggs are coming along just right." He mutters looking over my shoulder into my frying pan. I don't know if he's talking to me specifically or to everyone in the room. "Don't forget to taste your food, always taste your food."

He speaks to the entire class as he walks away from my spot to go to someone else's, "We will have a special guest join us for the first week of our cooking class, and he will be tasting and giving notes on your food."

The first person I thought of was Chef Gordon Ramsay or Chef Scott Conant. I wouldn't mind either of them coming here and teaching me a little something about food.

As if the guest heard Chef Ray beginning to introduce him, he enters the room through the double doors, everyone's eyes on him. My jaws drops agape as I take him in, remembering that face from last night—and dare I say he looks even better without the makeup. I silently pray for the next half hour he doesn't seem to notice me at all.

Last night at the party after Dean and I went inside I went against my better judgement and had a drink or two. I figured since I was partying, I wouldn't be able to really have fun without a drink. I thought I'd become my old self again and be the buzz kill at the party. Then I met Oliver Penn. Meeting him at that party was the worst thing I could have ever done with a few drinks in my system.

After those few drinks, Oliver was flirting and I enjoyed the attention, especially after my weeks of abstinence since Hayden's been in jail. By the end of the night he was trying to make a move on me and the only rational thing I could think of at them moment was telling him I had to use the restroom. I figured I would never see him again so instead of using the restroom I slipped into one of the bedrooms and exited through the back door. I had to run through the yard to get to my car in the front and go home.

I told myself that no matter how desperate and sexually needy I was, there was no way I was ever going to hurt Hayden by cheating on him again. I don't want to be my mother, she cheated on my dad on a weekly basis and then had a child with one of those guys. I don't want to be that person.

I will wait for Hayden, even if that means months will pass before I get to have him again. That will make it all the more enrapturing and all the more satisfying.

"Ah, Miss Greene," Oliver mutters discreetly while observing my food. "I missed you last night after you ran off on me."

"I'm sorry about that. I realized I was in too deep and the only thing I could thing of doing was escaping through the back doors."

"You could make it up to me by letting me take you out tonight."

"Oliver, I can't. I have a boyfriend."