Addicted (Dylan O'Brien)

Chapter 53

Skylar's POV:

Tossing and turning, I can't find a comfortable spot to fall back asleep in. Rolling over in bed I hear a pillow flop to the floor. Early morning sunlight streams in through our sheer curtains. The room is absolutely silent, no snoring from Cher's side of the room, no alarm to wake me up and... I reach my hand around and feel next to me.

My heart drops in my chest.... no Dylan.

I try to squeeze my eyes tighter, hoping this is just a messed up dream and that he's still in my bed. He promised, he told me he wouldn't leave. Sucking in a breath and some courage I open my eyes and scan my dorm.

I'm alone.

If I'm being honest with myself, I should of known. He would of only stayed as long as he needed to. Not for me, for when I needed him, not for the reassurance that he was ok. All those bruises covering his body, my stomach churns. He never answered my question, he simply ignored it. Like if ignoring my questions will make it go away. That isn't how this works.

I should of known he wouldn't stay all night, he wouldn't even answer a simple yes or no question for me. How am I suppose to do this if I don't even know if he's okay, or what he's doing when he disappears for days on end?

Pain swells in my chest at the thought of Dylan going back to that fight club, willingly putting himself in harms way. My chest constricts at the thought of someone hurting him. I lay down with my arm over my eyes trying to breathe through the pain.

I should of known... I'm such a fool for thi-

The door opens and I sit up and my entire body does a sigh of relief as Dylan walks through with messy bed head and a rumpled t-shirt.

His dark tired eyes find mine and I swear his smile reaches those heavenly deep eyes, "Hey." his voice is still filled with sleep as he shuts the door behind him.

"Good morning" I resist the urge to jump out of bed and run to him.

He runs his hand through his messy bed hair and it stands in all directions. His eyes are surrounded by dark circles and his shoulders shag forward like they're carrying the weight of the world on them. Something is off.

"How long have you been awake?" he asks walking over to the bed after he takes his shoes off.

I push back and relax against the head board as he climbs back into bed, "Only a few minutes."

Dylan sluggishly climbs over me and lays beside my, his head in my lap and he wraps his arms around my thighs, "It's early you should get more sleep."

"Me?" I run my fingers through his hair, "I'm not the one who looks like they haven't slept in a week." I joke with him.

"I had a night mare." his voice is flat, distant.

I try not to tense below him, afraid I'll scare him away with any sudden reaction, "How long have you been awake?"

He shrugs, "I think I slept an hour then woke up." he nestles into my lap like a child seeking protection from the big bad world.

I continue running my fingers through his hair, "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, but... what was the nightmare about?" I ask softly, tentatively trying to avoid anything that may set him off when he's this vulnerable.

His shoulders tense and his body stills. We sit in silence for a short while till his body finally relaxes again and I hear him release a breath. "It's the same nightmare I've had for the last five years. It's the same one I had when you slept over." he begins.

"I woke up forgetting where I was, I thought I fucked up again and ended up in some strangers bed." he sounds broken as he talks, holding me close to him, "I almost got up and ran, I just... I needed some sort of release but when I sat up ready to bolt I saw who I was sleeping next to. I almost thought it was a cruel dream, like my subconscious showing me what I couldn't have. But as I watched you sleep it became real again. The panic in my chest went away and the anger I usually feel after waking up from it slowly calmed down. It was so... weird." he finishes.