Chapter 2 - The Battle Within

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James woke up in a cold sweat, his chest raising and falling. He sat up quickly from a nightmare, one that really boggled his mind. He saw her again in his dreams, this entire week he saw nothing but her when he closed his eyes. Her long hair swaying in the hot breeze, her lips parting as she smiled back at him, her eyes glowing almost calling out his name. But what troubled him was that before the dream ends he's standing over her crumpled up body. She is beneath him, almost entirely naked. Her neck is broken, her mouth left hanging and her eyes are lifeless.

He realizes his hands and wrists hurt, looking down James' notices they are trembling. Putting the pieces together he understands he just strangled her. Choked the last breath of life right out of her lips. Before he wakes he screams an agonizing moan of despair that carries on into reality.

"You ok? What happened?" Albert wakes up in a confused dazed turning on the small lamp by his bedside table. Still drunk with sleep he looks over at this roommate, the covers have fallen of James' bare chest, Albert can tell it's been another nightmare. It's the 3rd time this week he's woken up screaming or wailing, as usually in a sweaty daze.

"Nothing I just....had another bad dream" James responded shamefully looking at his palms, could they ever be capable of such a horrendous act? Surely not.

"What's with you lately?" Albert sits up on his bed and rubs his eyes shaking off the sleepiness. "Are you getting sick or something?"

"No, I don't think-" Actually maybe I am if this keeps up, James thought.

Albert got up and went to the kitchen grabbing a water bottle. "Here," He handed it to James and took a seat at the edge of his bed.

"Thanks, sorry I woke you." He took the bottle and gulped it down, water escaped the corner of his lips and traveled down his neck. Albert couldn't help but watch it trickle down slowly, but he caught himself staring at his friend and turned away hiding his blushing cheeks.

"Get to sleep, gotta wake up early tomorrow." he said as he climbed back into his own bed.

And with that both men turned their backs towards each other on opposites sides of the room, partially covered themselves with thin sheets before closing their eyes. James pulled out the purple scrunchie from underneath his bed, he had kept it with him at all times since he met Elizabeth, her scent still lingered on the hair tie. He put it to his nose, her smell calmed him back to sleep.


The early morning sun broke through the white curtains, James' preferred them thin to allow more natural light into their tiny apartment. The brightness woke him up from his half sleep form and he immediately shot up remembering it was Sunday.

She said she's be there, he told himself feeling a small surge of adrenaline begin to build up inside his stomach. Today, for reasons he would not admit to himself, he spent extra time in the shower, making sure he was completely clean in every crevice and also shaving each stubble he had previously neglected.

Or maybe she won't... not that I care...his conscience kept bouncing back and forth on his projected intentions.

"Hey! I need to use the bathroom too" Albert knocked on the door again. Their one bedroom apartment was small for two men but they agreed to share and put up with it considering they both went to the same seminary nearby and their finances were tight.

"Alright," James unlocked the door but did not leave, he was tediously shaving his neck.

"Uh.. can you leave ?" At this point Albert was almost bouncing up and down ready to burst.

"Just go I'm not looking," James snickered, to him it was the same as sharing a public bathroom.

But for Albert it was awkward, he had no choice but to unzip his pants and relieve himself. For reasons Albert would never admit, his eyes kept glancing over at James who was still positioned at the bathroom mirror. He watched his partner carefully stretching his neck side to side trying to get the closest shave possible. Albert watched James neck, his shoulders...his back...the muscles in his arms as he held the razor up to his delightfully strong jaw line.

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