Crush imagines

Confession pt.1

Guys, this will be a little complicated, but italic texts are C/N's text messages.

And bold texts are from you.

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Your heart pounded loudly. C/N had texted you. A heart.

You giggled nervously, overthinking about what you should say next. You had left him on read for about 5 minutes already. Your thumb hovering above the heart emoji. Yeah, maybe you should just send him back the red organ emoji. Sighing in annoyance, you scrolled back up to see the conversation between you two. What happened, why did he suddenly send you a heart? Wasn't it a light-hearted conversation?

You closed your eyes and sent back the heart. Yeah... Why not? I mean if he can send you that, why can't you do the same?

'How do I know you mean it or not (about the heart).'

You blinked, as you paced out. What?

''What did I just read? Did he just ask me to prove it?'' You whispered to yourself. You can feel droplets of sweat forming on your forehead. 'Don't overthink it, don't overthink it.' You rolled back on your stomach, feeling your blanket slowly wrapping around your legs. Maybe this is my chance to confess.

'Because I truly mean it. I love you.'

You shrieked and threw your phone onto the other side of the bed. Untangling your blanket from your legs, you engulfed your face in it. You wanted to cry from the number of anxiety attacks you're having. Why did you confess? Your friendship was perfect! You glanced out the window. You just wanted to dive straight out like a synchronized swimmer.

*DING* The sound of your phone vibrating on your mattress made you shiver. Your hand finds its way to your mobile. Grabbing the object tightly in front of your face to read...

'Wait... what? Do you mean you like me more than a friend?'

That's it... It's now or never. Jump now, then die of embarrassment and risk losing your pride. Or bloom like a flower.

'Yeah.'

Now... was not the time to cry. You clutched your phone tightly, breathing heavily. You waited as the bubble popped up, indicating he was responding. Your heart pounded ever so loudly. It felt like ages until the text arrived.

'Look, Y/N...'

CRAP. That doesn't sound promising. Your heart broke. Gosh, you didn't want to live the moment the bubble-indicating-he-is-writing came up. You didn't even want to respond.

'Look, it's not that I don't feel the same way about you... You are chill, and you seem to be my type. But... I've liked a girl for a while now. I just think the timing is wrong.'

There, he said it. C/N rejected you. You smiled, knowing so well, that the moment your lips curve back down, the tears will start flowing. So, you kept on the smile. Ignoring the hot water streaming down your cheeks. Hey, at least you tried. It feels like an enormous rock fell off your shoulders. You didn't have to worry about making a good impression on him anymore. But, the feeling of getting rejected, it felt like someone slapped your hard on your self-esteem.

What does he mean by the timing is wrong? If he likes me and another girl... What? You whimpered, as few sobs escaped.

You turned to your phone and typed.

'Aha... is it working between you and her?' You couldn't help, but feel something break inside of you, the moment you asked it.

'Yeah, I guess :D '

Yup, this was the sign to back down.

'Alright...' You felt so hopeless, that you sent, 'I give up, hahaha, good luck.'

Yup, petty move. Maybe, you should take a walk to clear your mind. You were angry at yourself. You knew you had no chance with him, yet you pushed it further. You want to yell at yourself for hurting your own pride. You left your house, without your phone, to not distract your walk.

---

An hour later

Yes, you cried during your walk, but it felt right. Just this time, you'll cry for a guy. Just this time. Not anymore. You've cleared all hatred against yourself and started to accept the situation. You smiled, as you glanced at your phone, face down on your bed. Deep down, you wanted to know if C/N sent you something. You hated to admit it, but it was your guilty pleasure. Just once.

Your smiled faltered, as you read what he had said next.

'Can we at least stay friends?'

'Well, say something... :/'

Your limbs fell to the ground, as you just wanted to cry. You choked as new waves of sobs came crashing. Your phone fell with a thud onto the ground. The hot streams of tears dripped down onto the floor. You hid your face in your hands, not able to control your emotions. Maybe you held it in for so long. You just wanted to forget about everything that happened today. But, of course, that is impossible.

You left him on read.

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I AM BACK GUYS, AND I WILL QUICKLY WRITE THE PART 2!

Thank you so much for showing me support for this hopeless book. Thank you so much for cheering me, and giving new ideas. I will write the ones you guys have asked.

It's almost 2018, so write your resolutions, and fill yourself up with determination to keep them. Surround yourself with the people you love for the New Year. (Even if it's not your crush). I wish you all to be healthy, happy, and stress-free for this year.

For the Asians that read my book, I know it is not officially our New Year yet, but... I wish you health and a ton of red envelopes. (Because they're the only legit reason I still bow at the relatives I hate the most...) Ok, I'm being mean, but it's the truth. Smile, and enjoy the festivities.