Transitioning

Jaelyn

Volume Seven

I sighed turning my phone off since it seemed like no one would leave me alone, I sighed turning on my stomach turning up my iPad to continue playing the sad music. I wiped my face as more tears dropped, it was so annoying when all you wanted to do was feel better.

"Jae. Jaelyn!" I heard my mom as she started snapping her fingers, I rolled my eyes still ignoring her. "Jaelyn-"

"I don't want to eat, I don't want to talk, I don't want to see Shepherd, I don't want to see Jala, I want to lay in my bed, cry until I'm empty. Can you please leave me alone?" 

"Jae, I'll be back. You gotta eat."

I heard my door close as I turned staring at the window, I stood up stripping. I grabbed my beats pill and iPad covering my body with a towel. I walked out my room going in the bathroom, I ran water the hottest it can go. I watched the water run as I poured some bubbles in the water, I grabbed two candles lighting it then turned off the light getting in the bath. 

"Baby I'm a mess, out of every piece of me and part of me, you were the best." I sung along to Melanie Fiona. "And he got me saying whyyyy? Why you wanna make me cryyyy? I been thinking bout you, got me dreaming bout you, every single day and night."

I stayed in the tub until it got cold, even then I still didn't get out. I just sat in the tub crying, I didn't even know I loved Shep this much. The feelings obviously weren't mutual if I was so replaceable, he didn't give a fuck about making me cry, he didn't give a fuck about me.

"Jae?" Laurie called out. "Jae, you been in here for a while. Are you okay?" 

"Jaelyn, open the door." My mom said as I heard the door twisting. 

"Just say something so we know you okay, Jae." Laurie said. 

"I'm fine." I mumbled getting out the tub letting the water out, I grabbed my stuff and opening the door. "I'm fine."

"Eat this." 

"I don't want it."

"I haven't seen you eat in three days Jaelyn." My mother glared at me. 

"I'll eat later." 

"It's some boy on the porch for you." Laurie said. 

"Who?" I asked walking in my room as she followed.

"I don't know. He tall and brown skin with a dope ass lion tattoo on his hand."

"Did you tell him I'm not here?" 

"This not his first time coming, he knows you here."

"Tell him I don't want to see nobody."

"He said he just need five minutes."

Rolling my eyes, I looked at her. "Tell him I have to get dress."

"Okay." She smiled.

I didn't understand what she was smiling for, I put on a shirt and some pajama pants. I lotioned my body then put on deodorant, putting on some socks and my slides I walked outside seeing he was sitting in his car on the phone. I walked towards the car getting in as he continued talking.

"I'll call you right back, I promise Stink." He chuckled hanging up then looked at me. "You look bad, you know that?"

"Thanks." I mumbled.

"Heartbreak can not hurt like this Jae." He said then started touching my hair. "Like did you look in the mirror? You really look bad."

"You know what." I said about to open the door but he pressed the locks.