Chapter 12

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I was in the car with my mum. We were driving to my brother's house listening to Choice FM. I could tell my mum had been itching to ask me something for ages, but she hadn't...

On Choice FM they were chatting some nonsense about relationships and then my mum decided to talk...

"So Ciara... how are things with you and Kyle??" she began

"Ermm... they're alright I suppose"

"I noticed you didn't return home the other night... where were you?"

Shit, do I lie or not??

"I did come home in the end... I was at Chelsea's." I lied, hoping she wouldn't clock

"Really... coz I spoke to Chelsea. She said she hadn't seen you since you left the hospital. So I'm gonna ask you again and I want the truth. Where were you?"

I sighed and decided it was time to just tell the truth.

"I was at Kyle's house... but I came home at like 1." I tried to remember what time I had seen that text coz if it was after one then I was fucked.

My mum made some grumbling noises and then spoke

"What makes you think it's appropriate to be staying out until those times, especially when you were at a boy's house."

I didn't answer and we didn't speak for the rest of the journey.

**

We had been at my brother's house for a few hours now; we were basically just having some family time. My niece was so beautiful ... apparently she looked like me, but I couldn't see it.

Anyway, they had named her Amira; she had blondish hair and big brown eyes :) I love her!

Eventually my mum and I left coz I had college the next day, and she had work, but I would rather have stayed with my beautiful little baby ... I sound like some any paedophile.

**

The next day I was on the train home from college and my phone rang... it was the doctor I saw at the hospital on Friday. He asked if I would be able to come in the next day to review my test results...

The way he said I started thinking something was seriously wrong with me... I spent the rest of the night avoiding everyone, sitting in my room thinking about my life.

The next morning I went to college as normal, but left early to go to the hospital. I hadn't even taken my phone with me that morning when I left, so I was listening to music on my old school mp3 player as I was sat in the waiting room.

"Ciara-Melissa Clarke?" I looked up at the sound of my name, and saw the nurse standing there. I got up and followed her into the room where the doctor was waiting.

"Hello Ciara, how are you today?" he asked

"Ermm... I'm alright I suppose." He nodded and told me to take a seat.

"your test results showed that it is possible that there's something wrong with you internally, because the pain and blood flow you were describing did not sound normal" as he said that I felt a twinge in my belly. "So we want to perform a little surgery called a laparoscopy, where we will use a small camera to see what's going on within you uterus etc. Does that sound OK?"

I nodded my head. I'm not exactly gonna refuse a cure for this stupid pain I experience every month.

I was booked in for an appointment in November, to do the surgery thing, and then I left.

I sat at the bus stop outside the hospital for about an hour before getting on a bus. It's not that the buses weren't coming, I just couldn't be bothered. I got home around 4:30 and went straight to my room. I had a long hot bath and then decided to read a book. Around 8 I went on Facebook, and as usual I went to inspect my husband's page. The first thing I saw was a comment from a girl called Carley, saying: 'I enjoyed today b ;) I'm keeping ur hoodie 2 :) xx' SKEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! Who's this bitch, why's she winking at MY man and why's she got his hoodie? As far as I know he went uni today... so why's this chick gwarning like they linked.

WHATEVER! I decided to leave it alone and go about my business. Fuck him if that's what he wants to do, I'm sure there are many other boys who would want me. And I was right; I went on my friend requests. Some mandem from college had added me, so I accepted them and about five minutes later one of them wrote some next message on my wall saying I looked nice today...

I didn't bother replying I just went ignored it and went to bed.

*

The next day I didn't have college so I stayed in bed for most of the morning and then went downstairs and watched Nickelodeon. I miss childhood, life was so simple. I had woken up with a major headache, and to make matters worse, I was on my period. My phone was ringing, it was Kyle...

"Hello"

"Yo... wha gwarn?" he asked, someone was happy

"Nothing..."

"OK... do u wanna come see me today??" he asked, as if I was supposed to be excited

"I don't fell well... you can come and see me if you want."

"Ermm... aite. See you later." Skeen, what you hesitating for you dick

I locked off the phone and looked in the mirror. I didn't look that bad; I'd had a bath, I was just in pyjamas with my hair lookin raga. I grabbed my brush and quickly brushed it up into a ponytail and sat back down in front of Zoey 101.

I started feeling tired so when the doorbell rang it took me a while to get down there.

We went back to the living room and jammed in front of the TV. Neither of us were talking much, I was laying down on the sofa, and he was just sitting there texting someone.

"Look yeah, if you're not gonna talk I'm just gonna go," he said after like ten minutes of us jamming in silence

I turned my head to look at him

"I didn't force you to come here, and I told you on the phone I don't feel well so what do you want me to do, jump all over you or something??"

I got up and walked out of the room to the bathroom. Once in there I sat on top of the toilet and cried. I don't know what's wrong with me, I hardly ever cry. After a while I left the bathroom and went back to the bathroom.

"...nah babes, I'm just at my bredrins yard...yeah" I could hear as I approached the room

I kicked open the door...

"I'll call you back." He said and locked off the phone. I stood there looking at him.

"That wasn't what-" he started

"...it sounded like? Shut the fuck up and get out of my fucking house before I do something I regret."

He got up and started walking out of the room, but because I was standing in the doorway he had stop in front of me. I moved out of the way and he grabbed my hand.

"GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME. GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE YOU FUCKING PRICK!!" I pushed him off me and watched him leave.

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