upstaged || markhyuck

55: awakening.

jaemin special chapter

the snow had stopped falling when jaemin's world finally fell apart.

nancy was standing under a street-lamp, her pretty faced bathed in the warm glow, as she kissed another boy.

jaemin almost felt his heart stop. his delusions of perfection in the girl were shattered, his belief that she could do no wrong had been set on fire and dissolved in the wind.

his perfect life had been stripped to what it really was, a failure.

nancy kissed that other boy, his arms around her, her hands in his hair. she kissed him like she had no other ties in the world. because she didn't. she'd made no promises to jaemin, and that stark realisation was like a slap in the face.

he couldn't look at them anymore. he turned and walked away as fast as he could, tears freezing on his cheeks in the frigid air.

the snow began to fall, covering everything in a layer of sparkling white.

jaemin got his phone from his pocket and typed a very brief message, hitting send.

to: beautiful nancy 💖
don't speak to me again.
whatever we had is over.

then he deleted her contact from his phone, scrubbing away tears.

"i'm so stupid, so fucking stupid," he uttered, stomping through the snow.

his delusions of adequacy had ultimately failed him, and he knew he was an idiot.

"living up to perfection is fucking hard!" he yelled into the empty street.

jaemin let out a frustrated yell, swiping at the tears that stung his cheeks. he stormed to his house, opening the front door with a bang.

"jae?" said his older brother, standing in the living room doorway with a mug of coffee in his hand. "hey," he added worriedly, upon seeing jaemin's bloodshot eyes and pink cheeks, "are you okay?"

"you don't get to ask me that," jaemin sneered, "you don't get to ask me if i'm okay."

he shrugged off his coat and scarf, hanging them up. he kicked off his shoes in such a way that jaehyun backed up a couple of steps.

"jaemin," he began.

"fuck of, jaehyun," he snapped, shoving past him.

jaehyun was hurt.

he followed jaemin into the living room, placing down his coffee mug with a sigh.

"now, listen, jaemin-"

"no," jaemin cut him off, turning to face him, "you don't have the right to lecture me, mr perfect. i don't have time for this."

jaehyun caught jaemin's arm as he tried to leave the room.

"no, you will listen," jaehyun said, keeping his voice steady.

jaemin snatched his arm out of jaemin's grasp.

"i'm your older brother, jaemin," jaehyun told him, almost pleadingly, "and i need you to listen. i don't know what's making you act like this lately, but i need to know what's making you act like this. i do care about you, you know."

jaemin exhaled, running a hand through his hair.

"nancy is cheating on me," he stated. "happy?"

"jaemin, i'm so sorry-"

"just shut the fuck up for a five seconds, jaehyun!" he snapped, "you don't know anything. you have no idea what it's like to try and live up to someone perfect. because that someone is you! mom and dad love you, jaehyun."