Be Careful What You Wish For

Chapter 8

That was when she finally noticed her fangs. She could feel that they very long and extremely sharp. Hypnotized, she couldn't stop stroking them to check if they were real. Unfortunately, they were, everything was real, she was a vampire.

Tobias interrupted her musings: "Do you feel better now?"

"Yeah, I feel peachy", she replied sarcastically.

"Look at me! Do I look okay?" she yelled louder than she intended.

She could see the genuine pain in his eyes, although she remembered enough to know that he wasn't the one who killed her. He saved her if that kind of existence could be called salvation. Seeing the hurt in the eyes of her savior, she felt like a monster for being so harsh.

"I am sorry." she quickly said.

"Thank you, I know you tried to help me. I just think that maybe it would have been better if you had just staked me. Being dead might be better than being a monster. I am sorry, I did it again. I don't think you are the monster; I just feel like I am the bloodthirsty demon. " She added.

He listened to her without showing any emotion. It was clear that she was going through a lot, and he tried not to show how much her words truly hurt him. Instead, he tried to explain to her, as concisely as he could, the supernatural world she involuntarily stepped into.

"I know that your experience with vampires so far has been a horrifying one, but I must assure you that we are not all sadists as...well as he is. Most of us just try to live in peace and to survive." he tried to explain.

Cecilia respected that he tried to help her but couldn't help feeling consumed by anger that seemed to taint all her thoughts. Being a vampire, not only enhanced the senses but emotions, as well. It was difficult for her to deal with so many thoughts and feelings. Sensing her emotions, he cleared his throat.

"I am sorry, you must be dealing with a lot right now. You don't need my lectures on vampires. I remember how difficult it is to get your bearings once you turn. I guess all I wanted to tell you, is that you can trust me. I won't hurt you. Not all vampires are evil or uncontrollable." He said.

She tried to relax a bit seeing that he did his best to try to help her out, but it took a lot of strength and self-control to try to find civility and herself in the given situation.

"Thank you," she said sincerely.

"No matter what I think or feel, I know that you tried to do what you thought was right. So, thank you for caring," she said.

Then, for the first time, she gave him a small but genuine smile. His eyes seemed to light up at that, and she felt sorry that she was ever mean to her savior.

Although he was a vampire, she could feel that he was genuinely concerned about her well-being. It must have required a lot of restraint and pain to get her to his house and care for her.

She didn't think she would have had the same self-control. Only the scent of blood made her crazy. It didn't seem she had any control over her actions when blood was involved. That terrible truth was obvious from the fact that she completely lost control when he brought her blood. One moment she was sitting on the bed, the next she was emptying the third bag of blood.

"I know this will sound strange since you are undead now, but I think you should rest for a bit. Try to adjust. I will give you some space, but if there is anything you need just tell me, I will be here in seconds," he interrupted her thoughts.

She agreed because she felt she needed some alone time to process everything.

When he left, she was finally able to wallow in her misery. She was terrified by what she had become. It was weird and frightening, the new body of hers. The body was so strong and vital and yet there was no life in it.

The giver of life, her heart, wasn't working anymore. Only when she couldn't hear it anymore, did she realize that she used to be able to hear it. While she was alive, she didn't think about it, but dead, she missed its comforting beat. She felt both as herself and as a creature of the night at the same time.

"What kind of thing doesn't have a heartbeat? No being can survive without breathing, and here I am not breathing. I am an abomination. I am wrong! There shouldn't be such a thing as me!" She thought to herself.

Slowly, she tried to remember all the small pieces of her life, to hold on to what she once was. But thinking about the vampire who slaughtered her, made her furious. So much so, that she lost control of her vampire self.