Be Careful What You Wish For

Chapter 17

Cecilia could hear voices calling her name and feel hands trying to pull her from her victim, but it didn't make her budge. Fresh, invigorating taste of human blood held her in its firm embrace.

Bagged human blood was just a cheap imitation. There was so much more to fresh human blood than she could ever imagine.

Also, she adored the thrill of the hunt, and the squirming victim made the feeding even more stimulating. It felt as if she was truly alive, filled with life and energy. The human didn't matter, after all, he was food.

"Lions don't feel sorry for their prey, do they?" Her dazed mind kept repeating while her teeth viciously tore into the man's neck, enjoying every second of it.

Too soon the flow of blood started dwindling, and she was left with a lifeless body on her hands and worried Tobias in front of her. When she dropped the pile of flesh that was once a human, Tobias tried to revive him but it was too late for the poor human.

"Cecilia! Cecilia! Cecilia!" Tobias started calling her name repeatedly to get her to focus on him because.

He knew that once she tasted fresh human blood, she was likely to go on a killing rampage. Even though she killed a guy, he knew that she would feel even worse if he allowed her to kill someone else as well.

Tobias thought it was his fault that the innocent bystander was dead, that he shouldn't have agreed to go into town. It was clear that something like that would be a bad idea, but he listened to Helen instead of following his instincts, and there they were. Poor Cecilia was, what she feared the most, a murderer, and he was too weak to stop her.

Not knowing what to do or how to snap her out of the blood buzz she was going through, he reached out gently towards her and touched her blood covered cheek. He slowly turned her head in his direction so that they were making eye contact.

"Come back. This is not you. Come back, Cecilia," he said in a very soft voice.

Staring in her dark red eyes, he could see the color diminishing to dull red as she started coming back to her senses. Her face went from murderous joy to regret and pain step by step.

Once she was fully back from her trans, she looked utterly crushed. For fear of her completely breaking down, Tobias swept her in his arms and carried her, at a slow pace, towards the car.

After Tobias and Cecilia settled down, he drove as fast as he could without getting stopped by human police. He wanted to get her far from the temptation as soon as possible.

As for Cecilia, she was still covered in blood, curled up in the passenger seat, her whole body shaking from sobbing so hard. It seemed as if she was holding up her own body from falling apart. As if she would shatter to pieces if she let go.

"Are you okay?" Tobias asked well aware of how stupid that question was.

It didn't seem like she was able to answer. She was so focused on not falling apart that he wasn't even sure if she heard the question.

He started driving even faster, no longer worrying about being stopped by the police. The only thing that mattered to him, was to make sure that she was okay. For him to be able to do, that they had to get to his house as soon as possible.

He wasn't sure how to approach her or what to say, but he knew he had to be there for her. A part of him wished that Helen had come with them since she was much more experienced, but on the other hand, he didn't want Helen there. What happened was her fault as well. Besides, she had to clean up the mess they left in the town.

The moment they entered the house, Cecilia used her vampire speed to reach her room and ran into the bathroom to take a shower unable to stand the sight of herself all covered in blood and the scent of fear hanging on to her skin. The scent of fear, from the human whom she had viciously killed.

As she watched blood wash away in the shower, the sight of it swirling around and tainting the water she felt sick with herself. She was truly a monster she feared she would become and there was no coming back.

That was the moment she promised herself that she would do everything in her power to redeem herself, to help life grow instead of squashing it like a bug. It wasn't clear to her how she would do it, but she decided to do something, something big that would make the world a bit safer for humans. To make up for the one life she took, she would do her best to save many lives.

As she finally finished her shower and got dressed, she decided to lay under her bed covers and try to find at least some semblance of peace. Upon entering her room, she realized that Tobias was there, sitting on her bed with a look of regret clear on his face.

He was the first one to break the silence.

"I am sorry." He said.

"I just murdered someone and YOU are apologizing to ME?!" She asked unable to contain her shock.

"Yes, because it was my fault. I knew it was a bad idea to take you to the city but I still let the two of you convince me. And the second thing is that I wasn't strong or smart enough to find a way to stop you when you lost control. You are still very young and it was my responsibility to help you. I failed you! You have every right to hate me." He said, his eyes filled with guilt.

"I don't hate YOU." was her instant response.

"I hate myself. It was my fault. I felt that I wouldn't be able to do it, but I let my selfish wishes come before human safety. I wanted to feel normal again and that is why I didn't tell you when I realized that I wouldn't be able to handle it. It was like I needed to prove to everyone, especially myself, that I could do it. We all saw how well that turned out." She said, bitterly.

"It's okay. We all slip up from time to time, no one is judging you." He tried to comfort her, but he knew there was nothing he could say to make her feel better.

After all, he still vividly remembered his first kill, that often moment when he realized what he was capable of. It would haunt him for the rest of his life. No matter what he did he would never be able to forgive himself.

"No, it is not okay. We can't slip up; we shouldn't be allowed to. The consequences of doing that are death and devastation! I will never allow myself to put my wishes first." She stated firmly.

"Okay, you two, stop with the pity game. I think it went pretty well." Helen interrupted, suddenly appearing by their side.

"She killed someone, Helen," Tobias said, seething with anger.

"Well yes, but better now than later," Helen said.

When she said that, both Tobias and Cecilia were staring at her in rage.

"My dear children, this was bound to happen, I merely allowed it to happen in a safe and controlled environment." She replied.

"You knew this would happen!?" Tobias yelled at her unable to comprehend that his sire could be that cruel.

"Of course, I did," was her cool reply.

"You can't expect a young vampire to go into town and NOT kill. I expected she would kill more people. I am quite impressed, my dear." She said aiming the last part towards shock-frozen Cecilia.

"Get. Out. Of. My. House." Tobias spat out the words.

"Or I don't guarantee what I might do, although you are my sire. You knew how important her first outing was and you lied to both of us. I can't understand, just leave!" He growled pointing towards the door.

"I am leaving, but soon you will both realize that I did you a favor. Everyone kills as a newborn, I just helped you do some damage control." She said flipping her hair and heading for the door.

Cecilia started towards her in anger, but luckily, Tobias correctly read her intentions and stopped her in time.

Finally, she calmed down and after he let her go, she climbed in her bed crying and swearing in turn until she tired herself out.