Forcibly married to the person whom rejected me

XXII

A divorce. A single word that could free me from the hell I'm living, a single word that could unite the chains around my aching body, a single word that wasn't easy to make reality. "And does father know about this choice?" I speak. "Not yet darling, I will as soon as I reach home".

"This is also your home mrs Connor", the familiar voice speaks. We both turn around to face the owner of this gentle yet strong voice, "oh prince Quill, it's so kind of you" my mother replies back. He smiles and sits opposite us. I bow slightly in politeness to him as he tells me there is no such need for me to bow for I'm family now.

"Alright then Elizabeth, I should be heading to your father now. Take care darling" mother Caresses her soft palm on mines before standing up, saying her goodbyes to prince Quill. I follow every little step she takes, like a tail to its dog. I bid her farewell before her shadow disappears from what the eyes can see no further.

I tightened my grip on the piece of cloth covering the cold arms of mines as I take those weary steps towards the stable. I felt overwhelmed with happiness as I could hear the sweetest sound, the warm sound that melts the Atlantic, the sound of Oliver singing to Matilda as he runs the brush over her soft curls.

I dared not to move, stood in a corner like a quite statue filled with overwhelming emotions. My heart races when finally it's been relieved, just by seeing him there, safe and sound, foot on the same ground. The smile begs no pardon as it grows wider and wider.

But then it hits me..

Thoughts hit me. Divorce kills me. Losing hope clears my existence. And I for that shall rethink my destiny. I lay my head as I hope thoughts would fall, as I hope Oliver's voice would wash away the dirt. I try to ignore all this and focus everything on him. The desperate need of me running in to his embrace, challenges reality.

He stops as I start to make my appearance, catching his full attention. "If it isn't the misfortune" he says bluntly. I chuckle softly as I stand next to him, "and you, the fortune, quite have a nice voice". I look up at him, locking eye contact for 2 seconds before he does what he's good at, no mercy. "No one asked for your opinion".

"Oh well, that's good news then. Because, I don't need to be asked to give my opinion Oliver" I speak with all courage, with all sarcasm possible. And he chuckles. He chuckled, he chuckled despite what happened earlier, despite the fact I kissed Edward earlier, despite all that. As if nothing ever happened.

Are you changing?

"And you quite have a big mouth for such a small figure", he backfires. I scoff slightly before saying, "oh goodness, as if you can't do anything with your mouth except throwing unpleasant words". I see him as he places the brush down and washes his hands, walking towards me, so closely, so closely.

"At least I don't go around kissing other girls, while I'm married?".

I was left there. Astonished, guilty, horrible, filthy. I wasn't me. And that small conversation I had with him, wasn't real. He can't let it be real. I stay in my place, wind howling around me as it shames me for what have I done. I hurt him, I hurt Oliver Quill.

I suck in the tears whom beg me to swim away, but I refuse to be alone without them in me. I try to run to catch up to Oliver, to hold him.

I dash into our room as I see his back, throwing the gloves he was wearing on to the bed. I run to him and stand in front of his way. Eyes full of tears as I try to speak, "you'll never forgive me will you?". My voice cracks but his heart doesn't. He throws the other gloves on to the bed before coldly saying, "and even if I forgive you, which I won't. You'll never forgive yourself."

He strongly moves around me before heading to the closet. I fail to hold my tears inside of me as I feel the warmth of them, heating my cheeks up. I can't fail, I'm Elizabeth Connor, I never give up.

I run yet again in front of him. Trying to explain my own side of this, the truth of this. "I-it wasn't my fault, I didn't kiss him intentionally. I-I-". "You what Elizabeth?", he voice rages in anger, "what now huh!? You're going to lie to me even more. Or will you tell me you love me and that I'm only yours?".

I stay silent, tears speaking more than they should. His face as close as it could get. And his breath, it wasn't filled with anger but sadness. "I-I tried to love you. I TRIED to force myself. I TRIED to change for you, and what do I get in return, THIS? You simply betrayed me. There is nothing to be done". It spoke, it finally spoke. His heart finally spoke instead of his mind. And I couldn't help but stare into those broken eyes, that finally revealed themselves, to..me.

I never realized it, never even thought of it, the fact he tried, for whom? For me, for us.

I gasp as my lips were at loss of words. I could see as his eyes paint a whole series of painful moments in his life and I couldn't help but hug him. I held him in my embrace as my sobs went silent, as I feel his hands wrap around my waist and his infrasound sobs couldn't be heard except by whom was truly hurt.

And that sound, we both can hear.

And at the moment, I didn't want to be forgiven. I just wanted to be there for him, for what may happened in the past whom shaped what he is now.