Love Me, Hurt Me (BillDip)

Dark Start To A Happy Day

Dippers PoV

I sit in the shower, on the floor with my knees brought up to my chest, watching the red liquid go down the drain.

Then I heal away the cuts, nobody else can see them, not even Bill.

He'd probably think I'm a freak if he knew about any of this.

After all, that's what Ethan thought, so it must be true...

I'm just a freak, a messed up, twisted, dark freak that likes pain, it's really sick but why do I love it?

I sigh, standing back up on my feet to wash away the dirty feeling I hoped would go away, but it stays with me, I feel it in my chest, I'm sick of myself.

But it's just- the rest of my body tells me pain is the most amazing thing.

And I believe it, it's great to be in physical pain, but why? I don't fucking know.

I finish up cleaning myself after letting the cuts on my arms disappear, turning the shower off and drying myself to get dressed.

I leave the bathroom, shaking the water droplets out of my hair.

Then I head downstairs, rubbing my left arm, I feel the scars from before.

From when they thought Ethan hurt me, like he did something bad.

Ah how they were wrong...

I snicker to myself as I walk into the living room, seeing Mabel and Bill, the demon sits on the recliner while my twin sits on the long couch.

My legs take me right over to Bill, to take a seat on his lap, huddling close to him.

"Hey, bro bro." Mabel smiles, I smile back.

"Hey, Mabes." I whisper back, then looked over to the tv.

Family Guy was playing, so I close my eyes and nuzzle my nose in Bills hair.

"You okay, babes?" I nod, eyes meeting his.

"Just bored." I mumble, fiddling with his large hand that sat on my knee.

My fingers run over his knuckles, feeling some healed scars from incidents from the past.

"Maybe Mabel has something in mind that will cure that boredom." He smiles, I nod and look over to my twin who watches the show being played.

"Mabel, I'm bored." And usually that's all I have to say for her to get an idea of what we should do or what would be fun.

"Hm, do you guys wanna go on a hike? Maybe go to that new ice cream place they built in town? Oh, I know, we could go to the movies later after getting ice cream!" I smile and giggle, Bill chuckles a little in my ear and I have to force down a blush.

"Sounds good to me." I say, getting up on my feet.

Bill stands to kiss my forehead, then he tells Mabel we'll be back after we get ready.

He takes my hand and leads me back upstairs to change, I didn't really plan on going out so I just wear one of his shirts and shorts.

So I gather some clothes and head into the bathroom, changing quickly into some black sweat pants and just throwing a blue plaid shirt, keeping the buttons undone since I also keep Bills shirt on.

Then I walk out to meet the fucking abs again, yes, Bill does not have a shirt on and dammit I'm staring...

"Like what ya see?" I quickly look away, my face fires up, I shift my weight from foot to foot, my hands reach up to cover my face, hoping he didn't notice my blush.