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Before he even woke up it registered that he was in her bed alone. By the time his eyes opened he knew she wasn't in the house or next door. His heart was already in overdrive and his feet hitting the floor before he knew she was with Hannah.
Shit. He sat back down with his head hanging. I don't like waking up and you not be here.
He didn't know why he assumed she'd be able to hear him. They've never talked without being in the same room together, but he didn't like waking up without her and even though he knew she was okay, he wanted to hear her voice.
Closing his eyes, he searched for her. It was easy to find her, it always was. He was drawn to her. It was like a string stretched between them and if he followed it, then he found her. The reason he knew she was with Hannah is that all her thoughts and feelings were about the other girl right now. If he concentrated hard enough, he could hear her asking Hannah to talk to her.
"Paisley?"
When it didn't work, he fell back on the bed and reached for his phone. A text was already waiting for him. She would meet him at school, and she took the dorkmobile.
That last thought caused his stomach to climb up into his throat. The dorkmobile? That piece of shit wasn't safe for the most experienced driver and she didn't even have her driver's license. She hated driving and was in no hurry to get the permit that said she could do it. She'd been just a little girl when her father died, and she'd been in the car with him when it flipped over. Most of her memories from that time had faded with time, so he wasn't even sure if she knew why she always felt panicked at being behind a steering wheel, but he did.
A nervous driver in the dorkmobile? What were you thinking? Getting to his feet he reached for his boots. I'm coming to get you.
He was already in his room getting dressed when his phone rang. "What...?"
"Was I thinking? I was thinking I wanted to go to Hannah's, so I did. In one piece, thank you very much. Instead of coming to get me why don't you go pick up the rest of the gang? You might not have noticed but the first bell rings in about twenty minutes." Her voice softened. "I never like waking up without you there either."
"You heard all of that?"
"Yes, including the attitude about my driving ability. I might not like to drive but that doesn't mean I'm not good at it."
He grunted.
"See you in twenty and don't forget the boys."
Seth wasn't coming again. Jackson looked like death, and Josh was so excited with his progress in therapy that it's all he talked about. Which was nothing close to what he was thinking about. Her name was Leona.
He sighed. Paisley? You don't have to call. I'm just trying to see how close you have to be before you can talk to me.
Josh finally stop talking and thinking and turned to Jackson. "Are you sure you should come today? You look horrible."
"Then I feel better than I look. I had to come. I've missed enough days."
"How's Seth this morning?"
"Sleeping it off."
He would imagine so after drinking for two days straight. They'd drunk so much it was a wondered they hadn't pickled their organs.
"Since you were watching over him, don't you think it would have been a good idea to stay sober?"
"He wouldn't let me stay unless I drank too. By the time we finished the second bottle of tequila and started on the whiskey we were talking about the girls we let get away and how much life sucked. I think it did him some good."
Josh glanced over at him, but Jay ignored him and that comment, as he hunted for a parking place.
Marco?
He smiled. Paisley.
I'm waiting in the courtyard and this is how close we have to be before you can hear me.
I love you. I hate your friends.
She laughed.
As soon as he got out of the truck, his head came up. What are you up to?
What are you talking about?
He didn't even help Jackson with Josh's wheelchair. You're trying to keep something from me.
Is that right? Why would you think that?
More than a feeling. She was purposely not thinking about something. It was like with Matthew. He told himself all of that stuff with his dad never happened so many times that he almost believed it. That's why he could never read him right and right now Paisley was doing the same.
"Paisley?"
I'm coming. Don't be upset. It's just a little surprise.
She had dressed up for him. That's the reason she'd left while he was still sleeping. He sighed, releasing the tension that had invaded his peace of mind. A small piece of her had been hidden away, and it had been enough to nearly knock him on his ass.
Is this how you feel when I close myself off from you?
Yes. Her voice softened. Except for worse because I know what it's like to live my life that way.
All those years I thought I was missing you too, but I think you were always with me. At least some part of you.
