A Touch Of Sin [BxB]

22.

Jake's POV:

It seems like I suddenly hate every piece of clothing that I own.

I must have tried and re-tried every outfit on twice. I simply don't know what to wear when meeting someone who is technically my mother, but hasn't been a 'mother' for a long time. I don't know who she is. I shouldn't even care about any of this. She left us and I stopped thinking about it a long time ago. But here I am, standing in front of the mirror, suddenly questioning what outfit is really 'me' and why this even matters.

A soft knock on the door yanks me out of my thoughts. Callum smiles softly at me as he leans on the doorframe.

"Need some help?"

He looks great, as usual. Callum seems to make really basic clothes look effortlessly good.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing looks good on me," I mutter.

Callum scoffs as he strolls towards me. "Everything looks good on you. It's sort of annoying, actually."

A smile almost reaches my lips. That's exactly what I think about him.

"This shirt is stupid."

"Just be yourself, J," he says, pulling out a white t-shirt and a denim overlay. "This is more you."

I pull off the button-up with relief, the collar was making me feel claustrophobic.

After I've pulled the new option of clothing on, Callum bundles my hands in his. He brings his lips to my knuckles and kisses softly. I relax at that and sigh, feeling more at ease with his warm fingers tangled with mine.

"Okay. Let's do this."

Ellie and Callum look pretty and perfect as usual and I roll my eyes when Haze and I end up wearing the same outfit but with different coloured shirts. We are painstakingly predictable.

There's tension amongst us as we drive to the restaurant. Nervous, jittery energy suffocating us. Callum's hand warms my knee and stops it from jiggling.

"How are you feeling?" Ellie asks, twisting to look back at Callum and I, before shifting her eyes to Haze, who is driving.

"Don't feel anything," Haze says, with a hint of aggression in his tone.

"Nothing," I lie.

"Hungry," Callum unnecessarily pipes up.

"Right," Ellie says disbelievingly.

When we step outside the car, Ellie silently walks around to Haze's side and they speak for a few moments. I turn away when she brings him into a hug.

Callum presses his arm over my head so that it is leaning on the car and kisses me on the cheek. His forehead is pressed into the side of my face and it's a comfort I didn't know I was craving. We stay like that for a few moments before we walk into the restaurant. After a quick scan, it appears Debra isn't here yet. I'm not sure if that makes me feel worse or if it's a relief to have a few more minutes to prepare myself.

"Is there a reservation under Haze?" Ellie asks the girl behind the counter with eyebrows thicker than the milkshake I had with lunch.

"Let me have a look," she replies, thrumming her finger over the iPad screen. "Yes, table for five. We have you located in the back. Follow me."

She leads through the main area to a more secluded spot near the back-right hand corner. I wipe and re-wipe my palms on my jeans at least a dozen times. I don't know why I feel so anxious about this.