Chap 21 - Regret

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Seems like I finally made a chapter of Artorius's pov. Oh yeah. I did. Hehe.

Oh and please know that I'm not really good at writing a male pov. I think. Either way I will do my best. ☺

Lets see how he is feeling now. Shall we?


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Artorius's pov
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My chest clenched in pain. I couldn't breathe as she kissed me. It was filled with so many emotions. One being hate. The hate she have for me. She let all her emotions into it. Everything. The anger, hate, betrayal, the pain I caused her.

Even when I felt her salty tears on my lips, I couldn't move. I couldn't respond. But she kept on kissing me. Pouring all the feelings, all the hurt she feel into the kiss while digging her claws into my shoulders in anger.

The pain she felt when I slept with others, the pain she felt when I'm with Bianca. The pain she felt when I chose Bianca that day after the fight and when I introduce Bianca as my mate. Every single feeling without missing a beat. Without missing a single piece of the pain.

I was in a daze when she pulled away and glared at me.


"now you know how I feel, you bastard. But that's not even half ot the pain I feel. You arrogant, selfish jerk!"

"I hope the moon goddess punish you and make you feel the pain I go through everyday because of you. May you rest in hell forever."


Those words were like thousands of knives laced with wolfbane into my heart. I can only imagine what she felt all this time.

She turned her heels and opened the door before stormed out of my room. I looked at her as she leave, overwhelmed by the emotions.


I was brought back to the world when I felt tears on my face. Tears of my own. Not hers. Not anyone's. But mine.

I'm crying. After such a long time.

She has opened my dorm full of emotions that I blocked years ago.

I felt my legs weaken as I kneeled down. I growled in anger. Angry at myself.


She was right. I'm such a selfish jerk. I'm a self centered bastard. I'm stupid. I'm a jerk. I'm a monster. I hurt my own mate because I never wanted a mate. Because I fell in love with Bianca. I still fucked Bianca after my feelings for her left. I blamed loosing my love for Bianca on my mate.

I'm such a loser! Such a coward! I knew Bianca cheated on me several times but I still chose her again and again. Even after I found my mate. Even after my wolf tried to make me understand.

I got mad at Aris several times for taking control and talking to Aerowyn. I punished him by drinking wolfbane a few times. What a jerk I am.


I blamed her for everything. I made her feel shit. I knew she wasn't to be blamed for whatever reason she left her pack, but I did. I did blame her. I broke her. But she still stood up. She still stood high and strong. Unlike me.

She is the true meaning of an Alpha. I have seen the love she has for the ones she care. I have seen it. But I blamed her.


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