Letting go of self-restraint 2 - All that is missing is a little one

Chapter 28

As it was only morning, they have decided to go back to Yiling immediately. Wen Ning was also not certain that Wei Wuxian would not change his mind if they have delayed their departure; he looked determined enough now, he could however back down in a matter of seconds if he started overthinking things again.

He handed the older boy his spare clothes and waited for him to change. Although they still did not fit perfectly over his swollen stomach, the Yunmeng Jiang sect disciple had gotten so thin otherwise that he was able to somehow fasten the belt in the end. His waist has been extremely slender before and the Dafan Wen doctor used to be a bit more plumb than him in the past.

Wen Ning was looking at him with pity, he could see just how bad his condition was when the older boy needed to make a pause while he was gathering his meagre belongings in preparation for leaving his temporary refuge.

In less than an hour, they were finally ready to head to Yiling, the closest city to where they currently were. The younger boy was afraid that the other would not be able to travel far, even on the donkey's back so he chose the closest populated area. They can stay there for a few days so the older boy could recuperate before heading anywhere else. Wei Wuxian desperately needed good food and a lot of rest.

The Dafan Wen disciple was waiting outside of the cave while for the other gathered everything he had and slowly and unsteadily came out. Then he helped him to mount the donkey and put his warm blanket over the older boy's shoulders in an attempt to keep him warm; Wei Wuxian's own blanket was folded under him for more comfort during the travel.

Wen Ning assured himself that the pregnant Omega was as comfortable as possible in their current situation, he took the reins and headed off in the direction of Yiling. Normally it would take half a day to reach the town, the younger boy however opted for a slower pace, he did not want to bounce Wei Wuxian too much.

He was checking his charge regularly; the Yunmeng Jiang disciple did not complain but he looked more and more uncomfortable and tired as they pushed on, barely managing to keep himself upright on the moving donkey's back. Wen Ning was afraid that he would fall so he made sure to incorporate several stops during their travel and he was ready to come to the rescue should the older boy start falling.

Stubborn as he was, Wei Wuxian held on as their journey continued. He was however visibly becoming more and more restless, his eyes scanning their surroundings almost feverishly, he was jumping at every small sound, holding onto his ride with one hand and the other protectively placed on his stomach. It was evident that his worries came back with renewed strength.

Wen Ning tried almost continuously to reassure him, promising not to contact anyone if the other did not wish so, swearing his support and protection. But his attempts did not do much, the older boy was stressing out and he could not do anything about it.

They have come to see Yiling in the distance just as the sun started to set. The younger boy was still leading the donkey, not allowing himself or the animal any rest; he wanted to find an inn for all of them to rest in before the darkness fell.

He stopped abruptly in his tracks when he heard Wei Wuxian whimper quietly. Although he grew accustomed to the older boy's growing distress during their travel, this time it sounded more urgent and desperate than ever. The sound was followed by a laud thud and the donkey's bray. Wen Ning turned, alarmed that his charge could not hold on anymore and that he had fallen down.

What he saw made him realize all over again just how terrified his brother-in-law truly was at the moment. Wei Wuxian was standing beside the animal, holding himself upright by what seemed like sheer will-power, his eyes dilated and his breaths were quick and unsteady. The blanket in which he was wrapped fell down and he was now trembling violently, although probably more because of his fear than because of the weather. He was panicking.

***

Wei Wuxian could not keep moving forward anymore. His mind was in turmoil and he could no longer stand his uncertainty and fear: "We are almost in Yiling now; it is basically a miracle that we did not have run into anyone on our way here. According to what Wen Ning said, the Burial Mounds are now full of cultivators, we should have seen someone already. Could he have lied about not notifying anyone? It is too quiet... Perhaps he had warned them that he had found me and they are now waiting somewhere, in Yiling probably, to welcome me back. And once they find out about the baby...

No! Surely Wen Ning would not betray me like this. He is too sweet and innocent to do that! I am just overthinking it. The Burial Mounds are vast; all the cultivators must not have gathered in one place. Wen Ning even said everyone went alone to cover more ground, there probably is no one else close to here.

I do not have a good feeling about this. Surely Yiling would be the first place where they would search and also their temporary base; the city must be full of disciples, maybe Lan Zhan is also there... I am not sure coming here was such a great idea. I will not be able to hide here. We should have gone to Qinghe, Brother Nie would have certainly hidden us there..."

His twisting and turning thoughts did not allow him a second of rest, he was now even suspecting Wen Ning. He had to run, he had to return to the cave, to safety. He made a step back, then another, he wanted to run away again, he did not have enough courage to face the others after all.

Suddenly, it hit him; he could not go back to the cave anymore, Wen Ning knew where it was already and the younger boy would surely search for him there first. And the Yunmeng Jiang sect disciple was not strong enough to search for another hideout at the moment. It was already dark as well, it was getting cold and his body was shivering.

He was at the end of his rope, he could not go on any longer. His knees buckled under him and he fell to the ground. Wen Ning had managed to catch him just in time for him not to hit his head. It was his last conscious thought before everything went black.