Sunshine | Markhyuck

13: Taeyong doesn't understand petty issues like the queen he is

Out of all the problems Mark Lee had and out of all the things he should be doing, he was not prepared to be still awake at 3am, covered in aloe vera, thinking about some guy for the past few hours.

Mark had a bad reaction earlier that day. Really bad. The new sport substitute didn't believe his sun exposure allergy "excuse" and made him run five laps, outside, in the sun. He was lucky Mr Moon got there at least by the third, screaming at the sub and getting Mark indoors, but by then the damage had been done. Mark had sweltering hives and spots down his arms, his legs red and face crackled and throbbing. Not to mention the genuine feeling of weakness as his legs failed to carry his own weight, depending almost entirely on Taeil to carry him. He was lucky he hadn't passed out, or else he would've been sent to the hospital. 

He couldn't go back to class but couldn't go home until his brother finished work so he could take him home. Instead, he stayed in the darkness of Taeyong's office, picking at the carpet for almost three and half hours. In times like this, any light, whether it be from just a lamp or his phone made him nauseous, and with everything swaying around him, it wasn't exactly ideal for him to do work of any sort. So picking at fluff was his best option to stop his head from spinning but also to keep him occupied.

Now, even though he was completely exhausted and high on pain medication strong enough to technically knock him out for a few hours, he couldn't sleep, his entire body pulsed with his heartbeat. His mind was keeping him awake as something burned through it. Cause even though his skin was at its breaking point, even though it hurt to just shuffle a bit, Mark could really only think of one thing. And apparently, it seemed he lied to himself and unfortunately for him, Jeno and Jisung were right.

A knock sounded from the door. Mark moved his eyes from the ceiling, mumbling a quiet come in and hoping the person could hear.

Taeyong swung the door open carefully, smiling slightly at him as he closed the door behind him.

"How are you fairing?" Taeyong crossed his arms, squinting to see Mark in the darkness, the only light coming in from the window.

Mark hummed in response, letting out a shaky sigh, "everything...hurts...so much."

Taeyong nodded, sitting down at the foot of the bed, "the sub got an earful from me so don't worry about that happening again, letters will be sent next time a teacher is away." Taeyong placed a hand on Mark's leg, the younger wincing hard under the touch.
"Ah, sorry," Taeyong muttered, pulling away immediately. But Mark didn't want that. He wanted the comfort of touch. However he didn't have a choice now, did he.

Mark swallowed harshly, staring back up at the ceiling.

"Hyung."

"Hm?"

"What does love feel like?"

Taeyong furrowed his eyebrows at him, "what do you mean, Minhyung?"

"What's it like to fall in love."

Taeyong scratched his head, shrugging, "I dunno, Minnie. I've never been in love."

Mark nodded softly, shutting his eyes. Small faint memories now playing through his mind. A time where Taeyong was loved.

"...remember Dongyoung hy-"

"Don't bring that up."

Mark opened his eyes to Taeyong staring at the wall with a hard expression.  Mark paused for a moment before daring to speak what was on his mind

"...I miss him sometimes, hyung."

Taeyong closed his eyes, inhaling slowly. "Me too."

Time sometimes doesn't heal opened wounds, only pulls and tears them further. At least, that's what he saw in Taeyong.

Both of them sat in the silence of the dark room, a growing uncertainty feeding itself through the air.

Mark shifted slightly, "what about a crush?"

Taeyong looked back at him, his eyes returning back to their soft state. "Ah," he spoke quietly, "that...that's the heart racing in their presence thing. The gross yet nice mushy feeling you get when you hear their name thing. The wanting to have them close thing. Crushes are just stuff to mess with your head, Minhyungie. People who, for some reason, can play with your heart strings whether you like it or not. And most times, you end up liking it anyway," Taeyong swallowed, "crushes are what people tell you love is."

Mark shivered, the coldness of the room settling around him. He wasn't even allowed to put the heating on as not only did it physically pain him to get up and do it but also it would increase his swelling.

"Does that answer your question?"

Mark nodded, "thanks."

"Will you be able to sleep?"

Mark frowned slightly with a shrug, "perhaps, but I'll be okay, you go back to sleep, hyung."

With a nod, Taeyong picked himself up off the bed, "okay."

He stretched upwards, a small noise escaping as he did so before making his way to the window.

"You aren't going to school tomorrow, you know," he gently tugged the string, closing the blinds. Mark watched him, mumbling a small "yeah" in response.

"By the way, who were you talking about?" Taeyong asked as he walked to the door.

Mark smiled to himself, letting himself indulge in his own acceptance, "no one, just wanted to know."

Cause even in the excruciating pain he's in, despite being still and dead to the world, he craved the attention of the sun. well maybe not the sun. His sun.

Haechan.

He missed him a lot, especially after the events of today. He missed the fuzzy feeling associated with him. Maybe not the burning, but definitely the warmth.

A crush.

How gross and fifth grader like.

He loved it.