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I AM SO SORRY I HAVE NOT BEEN UPDATING PLS
!Death, suicide!
Hello Skeppy! It's Badboyhalo here!
I hope you're doing amazing. I really miss you so I wanted to write a letter!
I saw the letter. You um, loved me?
I love you too Skeppy. I have for so long and it hurts so bad.
I need you. And I think you need me.
I really miss you. Do you know that?
Everyone does. We needed you Skeppy.
It makes me feel s terrible.
Was I not there for you enough? Did I make you do it?
I am not going to let my mind take me there again.
God.
I really hope you're okay.
We miss you so much.
I can't even tell you how much I needed you.
I woke up and thought of you. I went to bed thinking about you. I made my breakfast thinking about you. I went on walks thinking about you. I always thought about calling you. You were always on my mind.
I would even say that you owned my mind. Everything is based around you. When you were alive, I would always think, 'Would Skeppy like this?' and things like, 'He would love this so much.' And I still do.
When I saw that suicide note everything stopped. My breathing stopped, my heart stopped, my thoughts stopped, it felt like the world was crashing down onto me, crushing my lungs in the process.
Did I do something? To make you do it? Did I upset you? You said in the note that it wasn't me, and that don't blame it all on myself, but that's all I find myself doing right now. I miss you so much. I wish you stayed.
When I thought about my future you were the first person to pop up in my head. Oh my goodness, you were always the first person to pop up in my head!
You still are.
Words can't describe my love for you. Everything I did and said evolved around you. Everyone knew I love you. Everyone but you of course.
It hurts to know you loved me back. After years of being in love with you, that's how I find out? Poor on my part.
I miss you.
And I can't live without you.
I can't see a future without you, Zak.
Please come back to me.
Did you know that I haven't gotten out of bed in four days? Puffy keeps cheeking up on me but everything is so pointless without you. I can't see myself, without you.
Shout I just end it now? I mean what's the point of going on?
I don't do anything, and I can't do anything without you.
I need you.
I don't think you understood how much I love you.
But it's all gone now.
Every single word.
Is all down the drain.
And it makes me sick to my stomach that I can't talk to you anymore. I can't rant to you about random things anymore. You were the only person who would sit there and listen to me rant for hours on end.
You made me feel something. Something no one else has ever made me feel. You were special. I really miss you.
Could you tell?
I hate this. I hate everything without you. I hate everyone without you. I hate living without you.
Thank you for listing to me, loving me, caring about me, helping me live the best life I could ever live.
I know you want me to stay. But I don't think I can.
I miss you too much to stay on this cruel earth.
Goodbye Skeppy.
Goodbye World.
Love, Badboyhalo<3.
(650 words <3)
(Unedited)
drink water<3
