Mio Amore Rosso

Making it better

Tim's POV

Jason scooped me up into his arms as soon as we left the dining room. "Jay, I can walk." I pouted my bottom lip out, but held onto him tightly, tucking my face into his neck. He just kept walking towards his office.

I had to admit, he was really warm and it did feel nice that he cared for me like this, cause after we talk...I'm really not sure it'll stay that way.

"Uh-huh, sure baby." He smiled a little, kissing my head before pushing the door open with his foot. It shut with a soft click behind us and I looked up, eyeing it cautiously.

Why do I feel so nervous about this? Jason did love me. It was evident in everything he did. So why am I afraid to talk to him?

My past. That's why.

Anyone in my life that ever loved me, or said they loved me like this, had turned away as soon as my trauma and demons came to light.

It was a feeling I'd never get used to. Something I hoped I never had to get used to.

Jason had already told me he'd love me no matter what, demons Included, but I couldn't shake the feeling that he'd think of me differently knowing how Jack affected me. How easily he got ahold of my emotions.

It was pathetic.

A hand on my cheek snapped my attention back to Jason. His eyebrows were raised and he looked concerned. "Baby? Hey, you left me for a minute. What's going on?" We were sitting down now. Jason was in a big chair with me in his lap.

He thumbed my cheek and I leaned into his touch, loving how it made my skin feel tingly and warm. I cherished the moment for a few seconds as I closed my eyes, breathing in deeply to steady myself.

Too soon though, I opened my eyes, coming back to reality. I sighed heavily, lifting my hand up to move Jason's away.

His touch made everything feel fuzzy and warm. And while that was amazing and welcomed, I needed to think cleary.

He opened his mouth to protest, but I shook my head, looking down as my breath hitched. "Jason...I can't...I can't get him out of my head." Tears formed in my eyes, but I wouldn't let them fall. Not yet. I had to be strong.

Jason's arms were suddenly around me, pulling me closer to his chest. His hand smoothed down my back a few times before he started rubbing circles in the middle, relieving some of the tension inside me.

"Tim I...I'm so, so sorry. I never wanted this for you. I should've protected you." His hold on me tightened slightly as his other hand cradled the back of my head, bringing it into his chest.

My eyes went wide as his words sunk in. He was blaming himself for all of this. Why? It wasn't his fault. I sat up, looking at him confused as I shook my head. He couldn't blame himself. I couldn't let him.

"No. No Jay, please don't blame yourself. Please." A sob rang out and it took me a moment to realize it came from me. I couldn't have him thinking like that. Not when he has done so much for me.

Jason huffed softly and kept rubbing my back. "I-i won't. I won't baby just...please, talk to me. I'm here for you, I promise." He moved his hand to run through my hair, gently pulling my face closer. "Please baby, tell me what happened."

After a moment I nodded, sniffled, then took a deep breath. Jason kept soothing me by running his fingers through my hair.

It was amazing how well it calmed my nerves. I was wrapped in his warmth and it was addicting.

"I'm right here baby. I'm not going anywhere. I promise." As he kept talking, he placed kisses all over my face, making my lip twitch up into a small smile.