The Real Izuku

Grieve

    Izuku did get his couple of months in America. At first he was glad he took Bakugou's advice, but then he became upset. He was glad to be back sure but it felt different. On the outside it looked normal. People were running around either training or dealing with missions. Izuku was right there with him. He didn't know what it was that felt off.

    One day he went to talk to Tanaka like he used to as a kid. He didn't really have a plan of what to talk about. He just knew that he had to go talk with his teacher.

    " And then he came at me and I swiped his feet out from under him." Izuku was recounting the story of how he was training the long range fighters to fight short range while Tanaka finished folding the mats that the last class used. " That was fun. They have gotten really good since then. When we graduate I know they will be great heroes."

    " They sure will. What about you though? Are you going to do some hero work before coming home or will you just come right back and help lead us?" Izuku froze. He hadn't even thought about that. He had always though that his father would be here when he got his Heroes License so he was going to work as a hero for a while until he was ready to fight him.

    " I don't really know." He had no clue what to do. " I guess I have to come back home. Brother Andrew can't do this forever. He needs to train whatever new recruits we get."

    " I'm sure he won't mind leading for a while while you go out there and fight some bad guys."

    " If I don't come back after I graduate then I'll just keep putting it off though. Kaachan had to throw me on the plane for me to even come here in the first place."

    " Why is that? I thought you loved it here."

    " I do but it feels different. It feels off. I feel as though something is suffocating me but I don't know what it is."

    Tanaka thought for a minute. The place did feel different to him but it wasn't suffocating. People just smiled less and it wasn't as joyous as when the old master was here. When he thought of the old master that's when he got an idea of what it was.

    " Izuku, I think I may know what's bothering you and you need to listen to me about it. Don't just shove this to the side ok?" Izuku nodded. " It's because your father isn't here."

    " I knew father wouldn't be here. Why would that be bugging me?"

    " Because you haven't properly grieved. You can't help comparing this place to what it was like while he lead. You don't even realize that you're doing it. That plus you knowing you're going to be feeling his shoes is overwhelming you but you don't actually understand why you're overwhelmed. That's why it feels suffocating."

    " You think I'm overwhelmed by the thought of my own father? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard you say." The boy snapped at the poor teacher. " Yes he's dead. I know he's dead. And I know I had to take over at some point. I have accepted that. Why would that be overwhelming me?"

    " Because you are thinking you need to be like he was and you don't think you can do it without his help."

    " I..." He didn't know what to say. Those words made sense to him. It felt like they were true but he didn't want to believe it.

    " Being here is showing you how much you have to take care of but you don't know how you're going to do it. You always thought Hisashi would be there to help you learn what to do. I know that because you used to always tell me about how you were going to lead someday and make your father proud. You told me how you were going to have him by your side so he can watch you do all of these great things. You don't want to actually accept that he's gone because that would be accepting that all you had planned is ruined as well. Am I right?"

    " He's really gone." Those words hurt. He knew that he was gone, he always knew it, but Tanaka was right. He didn't want to accept that. " What am I going to do Tanaka? I can't lead everyone. I can't be the boss. Not now. I don't know what to do." Tears were spilling from Izuku's eyes. Tanaka went over to him and wrapped his arms around the small boy. He knew this would happen. He always did from the moment Hisashi had told him that he was dying.

    " You don't have to do anything. Not right now at least. Wait until after you graduate highschool. I will be there and then we can talk again. For now I just want you to properly grieve." They sat there like that for a while with Izuku crying and Tanaka being there for emotional support. Pretty soon the boy fell asleep so Tanaka picked him up and made his way to the room.

    He had passed several people on the way and all were worried. None of them had seen the young master like this. Several times Brother Tanaka had to explain that the boy was fine and just grieving. Once the boy was safe in his room he went to speak with Andrew.

    " What do you need Tanaka?" Andrew had asked when the man had come into the office.

    " Izuku never actually grieved for his father and he doesn't feel ready to take over so soon." He said.

    " You know what you need to do right?"

    " I'm already working on it. He cried for almost two hours straight. Right now he's asleep in his room."

    " Ok. Be there for him when he wakes up. About the last thing you mentioned. I will remain in this position until he is ready to finally take over. I don't care how long it takes. If he sits behind this desk before he is ready then it could end in disaster."

    " Thank you Brother."

    " No need to thank me. I'm just doing my duty as a Raven. Now shoo. I have some paperwork to finish." When Tanaka left Andrew groaned. " I had really hoped you would have stopped doing this to yourself Izuku. It's not healthy to bottle up your emotions. You've always told everyone else that but you do it to yourself all the time."

    He called the boys closest friends and told them what is going on. He gave them all orders to not do anything that could upset him or cause stress and they all agreed. None of them had expected this trip to turn out like this so they had to rework all of the plans they had. They didn't complain though since this was for Izuku.