Secrets Aren't Meant to be Kept

Time for the Truth

Time for the Truth

9:12 pm

The comforting hand that rubbed her back did nothing to smooth her frustration. Her torso inflated and deflated as she breathed heavily inside her hands.

"Don't cry, Star." Retra gently instructed. "He isn't worth your tears."

Starfire removed her hands from her tear-stained face to reveal a frightened look. "How could he? How could she?"

Her eyes glowed green as she thought about Raven's and Nightwing's betrayal. She thought of Raven as a sister. She knew how she felt about Nightwing. She had told her about how she felt about Nightwing. She had shared stories about their relationship with her. And she...

Her hands clenched into fists.

Why did she have bad luck with sisters?

"Starfire..." Retra opened her mouth then closed it before giving Starfire a pitiful look.

"Why her?" Her voice rose. "Out of all the girls in the world, why did he pick her?" The stream of tears flowed more rapidly down her eyes. She covered her eyes again.

"I don't know, Star." Retra continued to rub her back. "Their relationship came to us as a surprise too."

"How did you find out?" Starfire asked, removing her hand again to look at her friend.

Retra sighed and the pitiful look on her face increased. Nonetheless, she told Starfire how she found out about their relationship, what she observed, and how they treated one another.

The more words that Retra spoke, the more sorrow gathered on her face and the more frustrated she felt in her heart.

After Retra finished, she yelled tearfully, "What's wrong with me? Was I not good enough? I wanted that. I wanted to live with him outside of the Tower. I wanted to cook dinner for him after he came home from work. I wanted to go on dates where we both didn't have to wear our costumes. I wanted all of that!

"And how could he tell her?" More tears fell from her face. "We all met each other at the same time. I know him better than she does. We dated for years. He was going to propose to me." She held up her left hand so that Retra could see the ring as proof.

However, as she looked at the ring, she became angry with it. She jerked it off her finger and threw it across the room.

It was a ring that she couldn't take off while she was married to another man that she grew to love. Yet, it was something she didn't want touching her now that it meant nothing.

"They haven't been dating half of the time that we were, and he told her. I would have kept his secret too." she slammed a hand on her chest. "I wouldn't have told anyone. I had planned on not registering our marriage just so he could continue to hide his identity?" She paused. "Why didn't he trust me?" She covered her face again.

"It's okay Star."

She tore her hands from her face. "It's not okay! We dated for years, slept together in the same bed, and I had his baby. Yet, she got to see his face without his mask on. She gets to scream his real name in bed. She gets to do everything I wanted to. What's wrong with me? How come he never told me?"

"Starfire." The blond grabbed her friend and pulled her into a hug.

"It's not fair. I love him too."

"I know. I know."

Starfire sobbed in her friend's neck as she thought about her relationship with Nightwing. She never thought that it was perfect but she thought that it was close enough.