WHAT IF

The Kiss

                    "We are good friends." He said with a smile.
                    "Sure, why not?" I smiled back but my heart was making a funny dance on just waiting for what he was going to say, I wouldn't say I was disappointed..... Stupid Valerie what were you expecting. Eating with Hayden was nice, other than the sensitive talk here and there, he was funny and foolish though the nice foolish, just for the short time I was with him while eating I forgot about my worries.
               After our food, he stood grabbing my hand tightly and this made me smile widely, it's the way he holds me that makes me get a different feeling that I totally love and since we are friends then why not hold his hand back, I held it tightly and we walked down the street we had a really good conversation that made me think we are really connected. We sat in the park as well just waiting for time to clock 12 so that his birthday could end and we part ways. It was during that time that I got to know that today he had made 41 years and the age difference was 29 years between us. We got to know each other's hobbies, dislikes and many more, all in all a friendly "get to know" and as it clocked 12, I sang for him a last birthday wish song then walked hand in hand with each other back to where we had parked the cars, he opened the door for me and I got in then closed it back.
       
                "Good... "
                "Don't say goodbye." He interrupted me.
                "I was going to say good night." I smiled and he laughed at himself.
                "Okay then, get going" He smiled.
I started the engine to drive away.
                "Hayden?" I called him as he walked away, he turned with a wide smile
               "I had a great time today, thank you." I said smiling.
                "Thanks to you, mine was the greatest." He smiled.
               "I love the way you call me by the way." He added then walked away to his car.
Well caught our different directions back to our homes.
The worry of finding Andrew home started crawling it's way to my head as I almost reached, but to my surprise he wasn't home yet. I went upstairs, took a shower, had the time to sip wine in my bubbled bath, took my time to dress but Andrew still wasn't home, this normally happens when he has gone for a business meeting, I get informed though. I looked at the clock and it was 2am.

             I rushed for my phone to see if he called or his secretary called and I didn't hear it while I was with Hayden but nothing.
            "Miss Anna!!!! " I called as I moved down stairs.
            "Yes ma'am?" She rushed to me on reaching downstairs.
            "Andrew, did he come and leave again?" I asked.
            "No, ma'am." "Calls or emails?" I asked again, I was kind of worried, I knew I shouldn't be but I still was, should I say returning the kindness of making me breakfast earlier.
            "No, ma'am." She replied.
            "This is unlike him." I quietly said.
            "Are you worried about him?" Miss Anna asked in shock.
            "Embarrassingly, a bit " I admitted.
For the first time we actually argue like a normal family he acts like this?
            "Mrs. Smith?" Miss Anna called.
            "Yes?" I replied.
            "Don't hate him too much, his full of flaws but him being so proactive, bossy, controlling and always putting tails on you is all he knows and has ever known." Miss Anna said deeply.
I was left in thoughts, maybe I thought I knew Andrew but I didn't. I got my phone to call him, it wouldn't kill to at least care. The phone didn't ring long and Andrew answered it
            "Hello, Andrew ...." I called trying not to sound worried.
            "Arghh......fuck..." I heard the huge fall in the background.
            "Andrew ..." I called again.
            "Can you get up?" I heard a different voice speak to Andrew, I know that voice, I know that...oh God it's Leon's voice.

           "Andrew, why are you with...no..where are you, I will come get you." I said.
           "I will carry on from here thank you." I then heard the secretary's voice.
           "Andrew are you  drunk?" I asked not feeling kind of less worried on hearing the secretary's voice.
          "Why are you silent, are you okay?" I asked.
He remained silent then I hear the door bell. I walked in the direction of the door standing at a far distance waiting to see who walks in after the maid opens the door.
          "Andrew....." I quietly called looking at him standing at the door, he was disorganized, his buttons half tied, he unstably walked towards me supporting himself on the walls with one hand and the other holding the phone to his ear.
I have seen Andrew drunk but not to this extent, he always handled liquor so well, why this time and with Leon
Andrew leaned hardly on me in a way of supporting himself and more of a hug. He buried his face between my neck and shoulder. He totally smelt like liquor. I raised my eyes looking through the not yet closed door and on his secretary my eyes were glued.

        "Thank you." I said quietly, I believed if he didn't hear he would have read my lips.
         "Always, good night Mrs Smith." The secretary said then turned walking away,
         "Andrew ...." I called trying to indicate to him to stand on his own. He was not taking any step off me apart from the phone falling from his hands.
        "Did you call because you were worried for me?" He asked so quietly all most like a whisper,
         "You're so drunk..."
         "I'm not drunk." He breathed out  immediately. Much as he denied it he reeked of alcohol.
         "Come on." I said supporting to walk him up to the sofa so he can get help from Jordy, Andrew's home help man. As I laid him down, Andrew pulled me down with him in just a blink, he turned me down on my back and him on top of me. This got me wanting to believe his words that he wasn't drunk but the sober Andrew wouldn't do such a thing.
"I have tried, I have really tried." He said in a whisper, his face so close to mine.
          "First get off me so we can talk while I am comfortable." I said,
          "I have tried to see why I can't hate that bustard Leon but he gave me more reasons as to why I should do it." He said, his voice deep and his eyes locked with mine.
          "Andrew!!!!! can you..." I struggled to try to get him off me, he tightly held my hands pinning them above my head. I breathed out heavily absorbing all his weight.
          "I know and we both can't deny that our marriage is so far from perfect that we even lack connection," He said deeply.
          "and with Leon inclusive I can't control myself, I can't restrain wanting to punch him." He said, sounding lovely.
          "A thought of him being with you, I can't stand it. His intentions with you are well stated." He added.
The pain in his voice I could feel, my whole body having a new feeling, my heartbeat a little faster.
          "I don't want to lose you Valerie, I don't want you out of my life." He added so pained and sad, my heart raced, I looked at him and he looked at me,
        "I'm not going anywhere...."
Before I completed my statement, Andrew softly joined his lips with mine gently. I stiffened, my whole body in shock. Andrew slowly raised his head slightly above mine and our eyes locked, his first sneak like kiss and face expression were a way of asking for my permission, my body slowly relaxed and immediately I was completely relaxed, he softly pressed his lips against mine both his lips enclosing my lower lip. My body responded to his kiss and that easily I  gave in kissing him back. Our lips gently rolled and his grip on my hands weakened, his left hand gently moved down by body, his finger tips softly caressing my body, I was consumed in the kiss that my arms gently held Andrew around his neck, the more relaxed I became, the more comfortable we both got, his left hand reached my thighs slowly pushing my silky night dress up my body, our kiss moved from being a smooth gentle passionate one to a lustful needy kiss. An electricity wave passed through me when I felt his hands going up my inner thigh.