WHAT IF

55

           There was nothing in particular I had to do today, it's only Rose and Amanda that I have to meet.
I turned looking at Hayden who has been busy with business calls.
           "Sorry" Hayden said after hanging up the phone.
           "It's okay." I said with a simple smile then turned looking at where I was driving.
            "Are you always this busy?" I asked. Hayden remained silent just bearing a smile.
            "You are going to LA next week, then you are going to Japan straight after" I said calmly.
            "Then you have been talking about some shipments that you needed to check out, that still, traveling" I added.
            "Yes" Hayden agreed
I shook my head absorbing his business.
            "The whole month literally." I said .
            "Or more." he corrected me,
            "And your wife?" I said but I just slipped out cause originally that was my thought. Hayden turned looking at me in surprise.
             "Am guessing you didn't mean to ask me that." he said.
             "True, that was just a thought." I admitted.
             "But since it's out, then answer me." I said, I quickly gave him one glance then turned back.
             "I mean, we have to understand the kinds of husbands..."
             " we" Hayden quoted.
             "yes, we the wives. " I confirmed, its not a mistake I know what I am saying.
             "That word has now become so common in your vocabulary." Hayden said. I looked at him, remembering Leon was taken a back by me using the word 'us'. Well recently I don't feel alone like I used to, embracing my feelings for everyone and everything even my own is what I am doing, I am going to love openly the ones I love and care about.
            "You're right, it's gotten so comfortable lately." I said with a smile  Hayden smiled as well.
            "As I was saying, we wives have to understand our husbands and the kind of work they do but sometimes it's too much, it makes us lonely." I said with a smile. Hayden silently watched me then he slightly smiled.
             "Well we are both always busy, besides she has someone else." Hayden said a bit sad.
             "It takes two to break a heart." I said.
             "You know, I believe your wife is capable of being independent, being who she wants to be without any hesitation but I noticed that with you she hesitates." I said.
             "What!..." Hayden was surprised.
             "No, think about it, financially she is more than okay, Amanda and Ammon are grown to respect and understand what the both of you decide in terms of divorce, if she truly has that person and she loves that person then.." I said then turned looking at Hayden who was busy absorbing my words.
           "She is more than capable of walking out of your marriage but she is still around, allowing to fight with you now and then, go to where ever she wants and to whom but never fails to come home to you at any time, she wakes up and sleeps next to you every single day," I continued.
Hayden turned looking at me.
           "She says she is going but she is never leaving, she has you at the back of her mind." I added.
Hayden smiled looking at me, I could see the concern in his eyes and on the face much as he was trying to brush it off, I can now tell that Hayden still loves the wife.
            "And so are you, still holding on to what you call a broken marriage." I said that to him.
Much as I fancy Hayden, he makes my heart weaver but nothing will make me happier when he is happy as well.
            "I know she is wrong to cheat, but maybe we should stop blaming her and you find out what exactly made her cheat, maybe somehow it's your at fault." I added
            "What exactly would I have done, did I do it without realising I was?" he quietly asked himself out loud, he raised his eyes looking at me.
            "Am sure she was not like that before, so look into it." I said. Hayden giggled loudly.
            "Look at who is bringing up marriage advice." Hayden laughed trying to brush off his curious thoughts about the wif .
I smiled widely at him. I really have nothing to say about where I got that from but I said what was on my mind.