To The Moon and Back? (Rosé x Fem Reader)

Epilogue

5 years later

Y/N's POV

I closed my car door as my feet hit the gravel road and zipped up my jacket as the cooler September air hit me. I then walked around to the passenger side of my car and grabbed out the bouquet of flowers I had picked out. There are Camellias, which represent love and devotion. There are Daisies, which represent innocence, purity, and happiness. There are Forget-Me-Nots as remembrance. There is also one singular Crimson Rose, representing mourning and sorrow. I wanted there to be happier flowers around the sad one so she knows I'm trying to put the happiness over the sadness. I just stood there with my door open, trying to hold back my tears.

I told my friends and family that I wasn't going to come here today because it hurts me so much. I lied to their faces and honestly didn't regret it at all. I told them that I would be in meetings all day and wouldn't even be available at that time. I know as soon as I see her grave, I'm going to relive that dreadful day for the 5th time since it has happened. I got myself together as best I could and closed the passenger door, holding the flowers in my hands. My hands were already shaking with emotion and I knew this was going to be just as hard as the previous years. This will honestly never get any easier and I'm just going to have to live with this hole in my heart for the rest of my life.

I walked down the gravel path, all the way to the last name Park. My feet carried me all the way to her grave and I just stood there, tears blurring my vision completely, as I was just able to make out her name. Just seeing her name displayed on a tombstone hit me so hard in the heart. It felt like a million knives stabbing me at the same time; like I should be the one dead, not her. I never though I was going to see her name on it in my lifetime, but here I am, standing right in front of it. It was real; all of this was real. This wasn't a dream or some fake reality, this was real life and God just wanted to fuck with it completely.

I was so happy this day 5 years ago, so unbelievably happy before this happened. September 7th will forever be the day that brings me the most sorrow and pain in my life. September 7th will be the day that haunts me from this lifetime and on.

I couldn't bear not having her here and collapsed onto the ground below me, knees giving out from under me and I clutched the flowers to my chest. With shaky hands, I placed the bouquet down in front of her grave and traced the letters of her full name. All 12 of them. I couldn't keep it together anymore and just cried loudly. I don't care who can hear me, I don't care if I disturb anyone, I don't care because I'm allowed to grieve.

As much as I tried to shove the memories of today down, they still seeped into my mind. Clawing their way back to the forefront of my mind, I couldn't stop it even though I tried to fight it so hard. They still made themselves know and I was soon brought back to that awful day.

Flashback to September 7th, 2027

"Rosie!" I screamed as I was now out of the room. I collapsed to the ground in tears and everyone rushed over to me asking what was wrong. I know they saw the doctor rush out with our baby girl, but they didn't know about Rosie. I tried to tell them, but my breathing was erratic and I could feel my senses block everything out because I'm just in shock.

Everyone immediately stopped talking when they saw a crash cart get rushed into Rosie's room. I curled up into a ball and felt multiple pairs of arms wrapped around my frame. I heard my mom's voice the most as she tried to comfort me the best she could through her own tears. I heard yelling coming from the room and everyone here hugging me were crying. These were supposed to be happy tears because we just welcomed our child into the world. Except these tears are full of sadness and fear of the unknown.