August 24th- Book One in the May 3rd series

Chapter 58- BREAK TIME

Warnings ⚠: Child Abuse, Rape, Violence, Religion, Drug Use, Alcohol Use, Use of Slurs, Homophobia, Bullying, Mention of Suicide, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicidal Actions, Gun Use.

Josiah's P.O.V.

-Monday, November 8th.-

As soon as I ran off, I felt awful. Something kept screaming at me to go back and try apologizing again, but something else was screaming that I just don't belong there. So, I kept going.

I don't know what I expected from all of this.

From Damien...

From anyone in my life...

Or life in general...

But I went home. To my house...

I didn't expect it to be better, but I knew it was somewhere I could go...or, I thought it was.

The front door was unlocked when I got there.

My hands were shaking like crazy as I opened it.

Everything was quiet. My aunt was sitting on the couch, feet propped on the table in front of her. Based on the smell and the general fogginess of the whole room, she was smoking, as always.

I shivered when her eyes landed on me.

"...Where's dad?" I glanced at the door that led to the bedroom, before bringing my eyes back to her.

"Gone. Back in prison. Because of you..." She muttered.

I nodded. I felt calmer knowing that he wasn't there.

She suddenly stood and shot a sharp glare at me.

"You're not allowed in here anymore. Go back to your boyfriend."

I flinched away when she took a step closer.

"I can't." I told her.

She rolled her eyes and took a drag. "Did you already make him hate you?"

I nodded again. "I did... Please let me stay here for tonight."

Forever.

It's not like I have anywhere to go.

"No. Get out. I'm not dealing with your bullshit anymore."

I started to see the pattern in all of my relationships with others; I make them deal with too much bullshit and they end up hating me.

It happened with any friends I had when I was little, my father, now my aunt...

Damien, too.

...and my mother.

"I will never cause trouble ever again. I swear." I promised her.

"If you don't get out, I'll beat the shit out of you. Okay? Fuck off."

I backed off.

Even now, I don't have any clue where else I could have went. That is, if I actually left immediately.

"I don't care what you do to me. Why should I care? It's going to happen wherever I go. I might as well stay here."

"You're tough all the sudden? Just 'cause you fucked up your stupid relationship with that boy, doesn't mean you can come back here."

I took in a shuddering breath and looked her right in the eyes. "It was my home before it was yours." I reminded her.

Instantly, I was slapped in the face.