August 24th- Book One in the May 3rd series

Chapter 46- SUPRISE MURDERS

Warnings ⚠: Child Abuse, Rape, Violence, Religion, Drug Use, Alcohol Use, Use of Slurs, Homophobia, Bullying, Mention of Suicide, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicidal Actions, Gun Use

Josiah's P.O.V.

-Monday, November 1st-

I wake up feeling a lot warmer than usual.

Last thing I remember, I was waiting for Damien to come home...and I fell asleep. The one thing I told myself I wouldn't do.

I go to sit upright, before realizing that I'm trapped.

What...?

I feel strong arms around me, holding me down and against someone.

My first instinct is to scream, so I do. I scream, but I don't try to pull away, because I know how much pulling away gets me into trouble.

Not that screaming doesn't, but still... It's not the same.

My eyes fill with tears.

I can't move...

"What the fuck...?" Damien says, and he lets me go.

Damien...?

It's him.

He...

I sit upright abruptly, starting to dig my fingernails into my arms.

I look at him and try to speak, but nothing comes out.

I can't breathe... I can't think.

I can't comprehend what's happening.

"Let go of your arm, Josiah." He says in his serious tone.

I press harder and stare in his direction blankly. "I-I..." I begin, unable to continue.

Fuck.

What the fuck is going on? Why did he do that to me?

What happened?!

My mind desperately tries to pull me away from the situation, but I try to at least focus enough to hear him and be aware of where he is. Since we're in a bed together.

"Please." He says, shifting away.

I want to ask him what he was doing to me... Why he was touching me.

I felt so suffocated. I still do.

He says something else, but my brain decides to not process it and to go into shut down mode instead.

Terror controls my entire body.

I can't do anything.

It feels like hours before my mind catches up, and I realize I broke through skin. I pull my hair instead. That one is safer.

"...Why d-did y-you...touch m-me?" I stammer.

When did he get home...?

"You said I could! Last night!"

I don't remember that...

I don't even remember laying down.

"I-I...did?" I ask weakly.

"Yes. You said you missed me and to come cuddle you. "

Yeah... Sounds like me.

"I w-was wrong."

I don't like bed cuddles.

There's certain things strictly associated with sex according to my mind. Being in bed together... I can't do that.