After the kids left for Hogwarts, me and Sirius sat at the dining room table. I was eating breakfast. I looked up from my plate to see Sirius staring at me.
"You know I don't like it when people stare at me", I said.
"You're right, I know. It's just, you look like you've been crying", Sirius said.
Just then, Remus walked in. He sat beside Sirius.
"I was thinking about him, about Cedric", I said. "I was also thinking about...my mum. I mean, the thought of her didn't make me cry".
"You never mention your mother", Remus said.
"There's not much to say. After she had Lila, she abandoned us. 2 months later, we hear she got herself killed by Death Eaters", I said. "Idiot girl".
"You're not at all sad about your mother?" Remus asked.
"I find it hard to grieve about a woman who abandoned me when I was 6. And Lila wasn't even two days old when she left", I said.
"I'm sure she had her reasons", Remus said.
"Well, when Greta said, 'Tell our daughters the truth that their mother abandoned them', I think she made it pretty clear", I said.
"She said that?" Sirius asked.
"Yeah. I was listening from the stairs when I felt like the world was going to end. Doesn't matter anymore. Greta spent her last moments not caring about either of her children and I could care less".
"You don't mean that", Remus said.
"Yes, I do", I said, without hesitation and with no signs of lying. I meant it.
"You call her by her first name?" Sirius asked.
"Well, she has done nothing to earn the 'mum' title. So, I don't really have a mother figure in my life". I saw a picture on the table. I pulled it closer to me.
It was a moving picture of Sirius and two other people.
"Ah, James and Lily's wedding", Sirius said.
"This is Lily?" I asked, pointing at the woman in the photo. "This is the woman which you both confuse me with? We don't even look alike".
"Well, your hair color is similar", Remus said.
"Well, I'm changing my hair. This was my mum's hair color. I am changing it to the same color as dad's".
"I wish you could have met them. Lily was a sweet woman. You would've loved her", Sirius said.
After breakfast, I sat in my room, reading, but I knew it wasn't going to get me to feel better.
Every day, all I could think about was Cedric. I heard my bedroom door open. I turned away from the window and saw a House Elf walk into my room.
"Stinking Halfbloods. What would my mistress say. Oh, my poor mistress", the House Elf said softly.
I thought about telling him that I could hear him, but decided not to.
"Haylie".
I looked away from the House Elf. I saw Sirius standing by the door. "If something's bothering you, you know you can talk to me", he said.
"Yes, I know", I said.
"I know you're still grieving, but I don't want to see you upset", Sirius said.
"Well, I'm tired of grieving. I want to go on, but I don't know where to start", I said.
"Do you want to start with a game of Wizard's chess?" Sirius asked. I nodded.
--
Me and Sirius sat across from each other. The pieces on the Chess board moved.
"So, are we not going to talk about the fact that my sister called you and Remus cool. She doesn't even think I'm cool", I said.
"Your sister is something else", Sirius said.
"I know. When we left Hogwarts, she asked in an excited tone, 'Are you friends with a murderer?'. She still surprises me", I said.
"No one's heard about Karkaroff yet. He fled during the final task", Sirius said.
"I hope she's still having a good time. I hear the Ministry sent Dolores Umbridge to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts. I hope Durmstrang doesn't have someone like her", I said.
"I'm sure Lila will be fine. And Hogwarts will be the same...I hope", Sirius said.
"We're not letting Umbitch bring us down. When your name is cleared, you will get to step through Hogwarts' doors and she won't stop you", I said.
"Thank you for being there for me", Sirius said.
"Well, you're always there for me", I said.
An image popped inside my head. I was doing it again. I was thinking about him. The image was of me and Cedric kissing each other. I shook the thought away, but then I saw an image of me and Sirius kissing.
I shook that thought away. It can't happen. He's too old for me. We're 15 years apart. He's Dad's age and he's my best friend. Not to mention, he's Tonks' cousin. My best friend's cousin. Wouldn't it be cruel if I just decided to date her cousin? And Dad would flip.
But would I be crazy for wanting it to happen?
Mad-eye walked into the room. "Haylie, we have a mission", Mad-eye said. "I believe you both know Peter Pettigrew".
"Yeah. We know him", I said, feeling of uncomfortable and angry.
"We'll try to find him in Knockturn Alley. Sirius, you're staying here", Mad-eye said.
"I want to help", Sirius said.
"We can't risk you getting caught. Please stay here, Sirius", I said. Sirius stared at me. Finally, sighing in defeat, he said, "Alright. I'll stay here".
"Come on", Mad-eye said.
I got up and followed Mad-eye. I looked back at Sirius.
"Be careful", Sirius said.
"I will", I said.
"Haylie!" Mad-eye shouted. I walked out of the kitchen to catch me to Mad-eye, ready to go off on my first mission with the Order.
YOU ARE READING
What shouldn't have been
AdventureHaylie Snape was an accidental birth when Severus Snape was 15. But she was still loved by her father and she was taught many spells. Now a young adult and graduated from Hogwarts, Haylie Snape returns to the school to assist her father in protectin...
