My Soulmates are IDOLS Books 2+3 | 18+ [SoulBond Series]

237:her fault

*

She'd said it once, and she would say it again.

They sold a dream.

A dream of attainability, a dream of romance, a dream of forbidden soulmates separated by fate's evil hand. Idols were symbols of perfection; idols were forms of escapism; idols were fantasies that none should receive or could have. Idols were objects of great yearning, affection and sinful lust.

Idols were objects.

Her seven were each tailored and created to be the perfect soulmates for millions of people. Of course, there were fans who loved their music; fans who saw them as inspiration; fans who adored her men the way a junior would to respected seniors. Fans who admired their achievements, fans who loved them for what they wanted to be loved for—their creation.

But there were other fans.

Fans that were deluded enough to think that they had a chance. Young fans who yearned to be their soulmate and bath in their gold. Crazy rich fans who were obsessed with their fantasy. Fans who purchased their every album, their every concert and all of the company's stocks just for a chance to be with their idol. There were fans responsible for a good 10% of their profits, each.

These were fans who seemed to hold the very foundation of the company.

These were investors.

Investors who wanted their money's worth.

But when these fans transformed into haters—angels that had fallen from the heavens, demons that rose from the ashes. When people who once worshipped them as gods, people who helped lift them from the ground, people who brought them high into the sky. When these people grabbed torches of burning fire and screamed for blood, there was no damn way they could recover.

The losses were huge.

Even for Hikaru, the plan to reveal her existence had been extensive.

The company had prepared for teasing rumours of Hikaru alone in restaurants, a depressed young man without a lover. There would then be pictures of him with gifts and things that would symbolise his status as a taken man. Their first picture together would be concealed beneath an umbrella, just legs, no identifiable features. They would be 'friends.'

The company would later, after careful planning, finally reveal that Hikaru was dating his non-celebrity soulmate, and that he wished for privacy and the blessings from his fans. Had there been a plan to reveal that they were in a polyamorous relationship? No.

Never.

Because as much as the company would love to reveal the truth, and as much as Amber yearned to go out on a normal date with her seven. There was no way the fans, obsessed and crazed as they were, would accept that a single girl was the soulmate of all seven idols.

That a single girl was living all their dreams combined. That a single girl was, essentially, holding on to the necks of their idols by a firm leash. They wouldn't see it as fate's will, but a satanic arrangement formed from the pits of hell. And for a country as conservative and as traditional as the one they lived in, what they'd essentially done was take a huge dump on all their morals and beliefs.

That and a scandalous livestream.

Ezra had turned to Amber the moment they entered the car and begged her to not to use her phone. 'It'll blow up,' he'd said on the drive back. 'Don't look at it. You too, JieMi. You're not mentally ready to see it. Let the company deal with it. Please, don't look at it.' Amber didn't have the ability to be frightened for herself, not with the blank look in JieMi's eyes as he stared into the darkness.

A defeated, hopeless man.

Fuck.

She'd held him tight as they switched back, and she'd only held him tighter when they went to the private hospital to get JieMi checked. Her soulmates were there later, with soft smiles on their lips and hard determination on their faces. Their eyes, dripping with worry, flickered and trembled with fear when they caught sight of JieMi, bloodied and sickeningly bruised. But the blotches of purple, green and red didn't scare them as much as the emptiness in his eyes.

He asked to be alone, but Amber refused and when the doctors were done with their scans. She'd curled up against his body, the big spoon to his little spoon. And she'd held him, rubbing her fingers down trembling skin, and praying for strength. He melted, soft and shuddering, broken eyes turning into leaking faucets that dripped with gemstones.

'I'm sorry,' JieMi sobbed, grief stricken and body trembling with the knowledge of what he'd done. He was pitiful, wrapped tightly in layers of bandages and with red and blue all over his skin. A heart-breaking sight that sharpened Amber's own anger against the dreadful world. He wasn't in a good shape with the broken ribs and deep bruises all over his body. But they were physical wounds that wouldn't hurt as much as the pain in his heart. 'I'm sorry.'

'No, it's okay.' Her soulmates had replied back, desperate attempts to quell his fears. 'It's fine. We expected this. We are ready for this. We can get through this.'

Could they really?

Their manager arrived with more people, lawyers, social media experts, press release specialists, therapists, soul bond professionals. The team grew, and later their bosses walked in, along with their secretaries and members of staff. Amber was pushed aside from what she could only describe as the beginnings of a battlefield. And she sat in her corner of the hospital, nursing a mug of hot coffee, she watched her soulmates through the glass door of a make-shift meeting room.

There would be no sleep for her tonight, not with how everything was going.

They were accepting at first, nodding carefully at whatever the fuck the experts were saying. Then at some point Sieon stood and started to demand for things, and then they were arguing over details. Ezra shaking his head. Casper calling for them to calm down. Hikaru, so damn desperate that he'd slammed his palm against the table, yelling at their bosses.

Their voices rose but the sound was muffled by thick glass and hard cement walls. Her heart had skipped beats then. Her fear? A noose over her throat. The sharp knock-like raps of her heart on her skin would turn to heavy pounds from an iron hammer again and again. And it repeated in a never-ending cycle that made her want to retch and scream, but also curl into a ball and hide from the world.

It was nerve-wracking to wait, but she managed to do it for a while. Time moved quick and slow, a creature that she couldn't quite grasp. There were moments when she swore it had been years, but the flicker of light on the awfully white walls were indication of minutes. And the creek of the doors as nurses moved in an out were signs that it had only been hours.

Curiosity was undeniable. It crouched by her feet, singing to her to listen to its song. And when her anxiety grew and choked her. It sat on her laps, straddled her, overwhelmed her, and begged her to look.

She fought with herself for a while, questioned her motives in her head. It'll only bring you greater pain. You know what you'll find will piss you off. It'll change you. But then the need to know grew too thick in her throat, and the eyes of passing staff grew too much. Some observed her with eyes of pity, others looked down at their shuffling feet. It was maddening and she needed to know, so she pulled her phone from her pocket and switched it on.

A mistake.

Breaking: K-pop Boy band IDOL in a polyamorous soulmate bond

Breaking: Park Ha-Eun's livestream: Fans outraged as IDOL is revealed to be soulmates to one girl

Breaking: Wang JieMi drugged and abused by Park Ha-Eun

When did Ha-Eun start the livestream? The moment she'd seen the cops coming? The moment JieMi and Ezra had stepped out of the car? The moment she'd realised that she was fucked? Amber didn't know, but she also didn't want to look at it again. But what Amber did know was that she shouldn't have let the anger blind her, and maybe she shouldn't have pushed Ha-Eun to her breaking point knowing full and well what was at stake.

It was her fault.