Their love was about 'I am yours' but secretly they were just possessing the other with 'You're only mine.'
"I am obsessed with him, just him, you don't understand. No one can have him, he's all mine."
- Mania
"I desire him more than anything but...
Unedited as usual. You are in for a mindfuck ride here, this chapter will most probably help you better understand why Taehyun is the way he is. *Sips tea* I tried my best, hope you guys like it, I've been planning this chapter ever since I first started writing this book lol.
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He burns them, that's all he does. Hard work turned into ashes, ashes dissolving in water as if they meant nothing. The designs that were his pride a week ago, couldn't even ask to be trashed. He couldn't even bear to look at them, it was painful, his money and power felt all worthless right now, and no high contact could save his name. So, he does what he is good at, self-destructing, and trying to remove things out of his life because he doesn't dare to face them.
That's the reason, he's currently leaning against his office table trying to act indifferent, to show that he does not give a fuck as he slowly burns the pages of his drafts and lets them fall into the small tub of water in front. But he does indeed give a fuck, how could he not? He had worked hard for it, it would be impossible not to give a fuck. But Taehyun wouldn't tell that to anyone because he, himself doesn't want to admit it, he doesn't want to admit that the reason behind him shoving the half-complete dresses into the storage room is that, he gives a fuck, that he is hurt, that he feels weak and powerless.
As the pages of his drafts turned to ash, Taehyun's gaze remained fixed on the flickering flames. He watched as the intricate patterns and bold designs he had poured his heart and soul into were reduced to mere memories. It was an agonizing transformation, like watching a part of himself disintegrate into nothingness.
The room was filled with the noxious smell of burning paper, a scent that seemed to sear itself into his memory. His fingers trembled slightly as he dropped another page into the tub of water. The hiss and sizzle of the flames being extinguished mirrored the turmoil in his heart. He couldn't admit to himself that he cared deeply about those designs, that they were more than just pieces of fabric and paper to him. They were a reflection of his identity, and his essence as a designer, and their destruction was a wound to his soul. Taehyun had always been adept in managing his intense mood swings but tonight they threatened him to acknowledge them, never had the emotional pain manifested into his physical world but right then, it felt like someone was squeezing his heart tight, punching him in the gut. It was too much, he sunk to his knees in front of the tub as the last paper fell into the water, pressing a hand to his chest to ease the pain. Jaw clenching with tension, he pulled out the prescribed tablet from his pocket, quickly taking it in praying that it would cure him of all ills.
The world sees him as Kang Taehyun, an heir following the Kang legacy, a Titan in the fashion world, someone unshakeable from his position, an untouchable man but he was just like the common man, flawed, scarred maybe even more than the common man but will he ever accept the fact that he is just like everyone else, that it's the name Kang that holds value and not Taehyun.
He doesn't want to be mature and accept it because it'll be the death of the very argument, the very idea he has been trying to run away from all his life. He is Kang, and when the day ends, it's his family name that people respect, that his fellow 'business tycoons' only tolerate him because his name comes after Kang. The reason behind him not being able to form genuine bonds is that, he is always paranoid, about the people he lets in because how in the heck would he differentiate between someone genuine and someone just after his name? So when he flirts, when he charms people into deals, they are talking with Mr Kang, the nineteen-year-old boy takes a backseat, he rarely comes to the surface anyway. Mr Kang is a good man, he handles himself so well, walks with confidence, and sheer determination shines in his eyes, he is a perfect man, the way his witty mouth plays with people's brains is evident in his name, Kang, a commercial man and therefore, he is scary, he likes having control, he likes when things are under his control, someone who takes more interest in things rather than people, and that's why it is so easy for him to bring people in, he is indifferent to their presence, he says what is expected from a good businessman, he says all the right things because he doesn't care enough about the people around him to give them an actual thought.
