Breaking the Bond that Binds.

Chapter 65 - To sleep -perchance to dream.

This chapter is probably not an easy read...meaning I wasn't sure how to write it.   I won't give anything away but let me know if it desperately needs a re-write.  

Damien (PoV)

Damien sat beside Virgil's bed. The sight in front of him wasn't a pleasant one. Oxygen mask, IV lines, heart monitor continuously beeping, drainage bags collecting blackened blood and in the middle of this organised chaos a frail looking boy whose face was a translucent white, more corpse like than alive. His blood shot eyes set deep in dark circles, fluttered, searching constantly behind the oxygen mask. His cracked lips moving as he whispered incoherently, a one-sided conversation. The bedrails were up and Virgil's was strapped down by his wrists. but his hands twitched, his fingers reaching out to touch, grab, point, in time with his mumblings.

He had a pelt trap on over his hospital gown, his wolf had tried to leap even under sedation. It was disorientated like it's human form. It howled searching for something for the brief moment it was free, then fell back made docile by the drugs. Tentatively, Damien reached for his hand and Virgil grabbed it, squeezing hard, his whispers gaining urgency. He looked in his direction but not at Damien, instead he was looking at some scene playing out in his mind.

The Alpha pulled his hand away. It was to much. He'd only meant to see him for a moment before going to his office but he had sat down and time passed without him realising. Damien questioned why things always had to be difficult when it came to Virgil. It felt like he fixed one problem for another to pop up between them. The the bond was gone but he still felt as if they were cursed. All Damien wanted was some time for them to get to know each other. He'd been secretly happy that Virgil had come back, it was an opportunity, perhaps a last chance to resolve the lingering feelings he had for him. Bond or not he was still attracted to him, liked his spirited personality, the rare time Virgil smiled at him stopped him in his tracks.

A young young nurse came to stand by his side. She looked down at Virgil with amazement. His medical notes in her hands. "Good morning Alpha. He is doing remarkably well considering he ingested a large dose of wolfsbane." She said encouragingly and continued talking as she checked his monitor and blood pressure. "We all heard what he did, it was rather heroic." The nurse double checked his IV line was clear. "...not sure I could do the same thing to save some one. All the staff are praying to the Goddess to guide him back." She wrote up his notes and left quietly.

Damien sighed. He took Virgil's hand again and once more the boy's long trembling fingers held on tightly, this time Damien didn't pull away. What the nurse said replayed in his mind, perhaps Virgil was grasping his only flimsy lifeline to this world.

....

Virgil 

I feel like I have been lost in the dark for a long time. The sounds come and go, nothing distinct until I started to hear the sound of metal sliding on metal, irregular thumps one after the other, the rise and fall of conversation. Then the sensation of a cold wind running along my damp, sweaty skin, the burn of sore muscles and then finally...ah ...the wonderful smell of freshly baked bread is everywhere. I run in the early hours when I don't have anywhere to sleep. That's how I found this place a few days ago. Tired and hungry I stopped here to rest, drawn by the lights and heavenly smell. I can hear the two guys that work in there laughing, I enjoy that sound almost as much. Living on the street makes you appreciate stupid things like that.

"Here." It's the young guy. He hands me a paper bag, inside it are fresh out of the oven rolls lathered in butter, the bag is warm in my hands...it feels so good. He offers me a cup of steaming coffee. "You're becoming a pest. "  It's a grumpy voice but I know when I look into his face all I will see is pity and not the condescending kind. He's all bark. He seems a nice guy. I have nothing to give him to say thanks. The best I can do is smile. Then like a fog the darkness rolls in and takes me away, I don't mind. It's warm in the darkness and even though I am alone, I know the darkness is crowded with people, heart beats, gentle whispers, laughter.

The grumpy voice is moving closer. "You may have my father fooled but I don't trust you one little bit." Bark Bark, that's all he does. "Slack off at the shop, disrespect my dad and you're out. I'll personally boot you out of here." His voice is next to my ear, I can feel his breath on my cheek and then darkness is suddenly replaced by a harsh light. I'm in the door way of a small bedroom, holding a double bed, an ugly old fashioned brown wardrobe and boxed piled against one wall.

"This is will be your room. The bathroom is through there." I can feel the tears welling up. "There are some fresh towels and dad bought you those." He's pointing to a couple of target bags. I look inside and shit...it's new clothes, just cheap shorts, t-shirts, underwear ...shit. The tears are about to fall. Fuck when was the last time anyone was this kind...never. All my possessions are in my backpack and a garbage bag, can life be more humiliating. I couldn't believe when the older guy who owned the shop said I could stay in their spare room and he'd teach me to bake while I worked in the shop. I got a life times worth of luck in one day. I touch the sheets, clean and smooth under my fingers. It's been close to three weeks since I slept in a bed. I really want to have a good howl but I'm controlling myself.

"Just follow dad's rules and stay out of my way and this might work out." He can't imagine how grateful I am to them. I looked up at the guy, I can't help the tears. He actually has a very kind, handsome face. "Jeez kid don't look at me like that." James is his name, he grumbles at me all the time but his eyes are soft. He wipes the tears from my cheek. "For fuck's sake go have a shower you stink." He moved away from me. I do smell foul, when you live on the street a shower isn't easy to come by. "Put all your clothes in the garbage bag we can workout what is worth keeping. I'll show you where everything is in the house after you stop smelling like a kitty litter tray."

The room fades into the dark and so do I. I feel like a candle snuffed out and re-lit over and over again.

The warmth stirs me in the darkness. I can feel it moving up and down my arms. It's pulling me gently in to the light. It moves across my face and lips. I'm trembling, it feels so good. I drift up to the surface out of the darkness and look it the face leaning over me. James, I reach out and wrap my hand around his neck, his eyes run over my face, lingering on my lips. "This is such a bad idea." He whispers. I pull him closer. "Please." I can hear the desperation in my voice, I'm practically begging him. "Please, I'm so lonely. Stay with me." He can't help but touch me, even while he tries to pull away. "Stop looking at me like that way, damn you're so sexy...you're making it so hard."

All I can feel is his body pressing me down. I push myself against him, grinding my cock against his so he knows how good he's making me feel. He groans and I know, instinctively, he just gave up trying to control himself.

"You're to young. Find someone your own age." He's talking but it's just talk. He moans when I pull my legs up so he can settle more comfortably against me. The warmth has turned into an intense heat spreading through me. I want to stay like this, I so want to....but I can feel I'm drifting away in a swirl of fog and darkness.

The darkness is silent and empty this time.  No voices calling me or warmth to be found.  

.....

Virgil's room is quiet except for the faint beep of his heart monitor and shh of his oxygen mask. The night nurse is sitting finishing off his notes, her shift was nearly over. She checked her watch and sighs... there's been very little improvement. There was nothing more they could do for him but wait to see if he and his wolf were strong enough to hang on. She hoped the Goddess was watching over him tonight. It was time for her to update the incoming nurse. She got up to head the nurses station but before she left she spared one last look at her patient. It was the nurses heart beat that jumped when she saw that Virgil's eyes were open and slowly turn to focusing on her.