Chapter 40 - Another Check Up

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Amanda James

My eyes fluttered open by the sound of the birds and the sunlight through the window in the room. My eyes felt so heavy, very heavy I even have a headache. I didn't even change my clothes from last night, I cried myself to sleep and it is always the worst thing that have ever happened. I blinked couple of times then taking a deep breath, my mind was empty until it recall the memory of last night. I don't even want to remember it, and I hate the fact that Evan and I were fighting.

I was staring up the white ceiling until I realized that my mom was sleeping on the couch in my bedroom. She had this blanket around her while still have her eyes close, I don't even know how she got in I remember that I locked the door last night.

I moved my head a little and it wake her up, she woke up and her eyes went immediately to me. She looked worried and surprised that I'm awake,

"You woke up," she said and I can tell that I'm not the only one who look like a mess, she also look like a mess.

"How could you even get in?" I asked her then she looked at the door before fixing the blanket around her. She sighed before her eyes looked up at me, she look like she hasn't got any good sleep for weeks.

"I have another key," she sighed.

"You don't have to," I shake my head as I look at her, pulling my blanket closer to me.

"I'm sorry that you got into a fight with Evan," she said then I stay in silent.

"Why did you let him in?" I ask her straight to the point.

"I know you my whole life, you wouldn't reached out for him even if we're in our very lowest," I said while looking at her, I'm trying to understand the situation here but seeing her sitting right in front of him like nothing happened still make me asking, how? And why?

"Amanda," she said before getting up from the couch to sit on the bed right next to me. She looked me in the eyes before her palm began to brush against my head.

"Your dad,"

"He did the worst thing,"

"To you, to us," she sighs.

"He was here, yeah because Evan made the call but and your dad was here because he was worried about you," mom said as I stayed in silent.

"We don't need him mom," I said to her.

"I know baby I know," she said.

"I hate him but, I guess I'll be cruel if I wouldn't let him see you, especially in your condition-," she stopped before she looks away just to avoid the tears coming out of her eyes.

"He was cruel enough for leaving us mom, he doesn't deserve any of us," I said to her, but she already has tears in her eyes.

"I know how you feel, I know how you feel about him,"

"But no matter what happened, you are our daughter," mom said then I shake my head, I don't understand how she could set aside her feelings for this. I just don't get it.

"I don't get it," I shake my head looking away.

"He called Flynn, he asked if he could come over and talk about you," she said.

"I was also mad at him but you, you are all I have baby," she said before she broke into tears.

"We've been fighting over the years just the two of us," mom said while looking down at me.

"It's been always the two of us, I don't know what would I do without you," she said brushing my head with her warm hand. No matter how I feel disappointed seeing her crying like this always the worst feeling ever.

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