CHAPTER 36

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Ever since that night, V has been away. But I didn't pay attention to his disappearance. It is better this way because I am free from the torment he's carrying around me. And after that night I've been thinking. I don't want to continue living here anymore. And the devil never wants me to have my peace. So instead of pursuing him to let me depart from this world, I come up with the idea of leaving his den instead.

I don't want to stay here anymore. Yes, there's a lot of memorable things that happened to me in here. I met a lot of people and befriended some of them. There are some who successfully embarked their existence in my heart. But staying here only breaks me even more. I'm sure my departure will be nothing to them anyway. It'd be like I never exist and they'll turn back to normal. After all, they now have Eclipsa as their Queen. What is there to wish for?

I've been waiting for the right time to conduct my escape. Planning everything wisely to avoid commotion and getting caught. I didn't pack anything because I owe nothing in this place. Everything is V's possession. I'm afraid that if I carry one with me, he'll soon find where I'm hiding. Which is I myself still don't know. I'm still figuring out where to head in case my plan of leaving this place come to a success. Even though the chances are very low due to their tight security, I'm still hanging on the idea that everything will fall in the right tracks eventually.

I was pulled back from my thoughts when knocks on my door erupted. I don't find it necessary because even if I refuse for them to enter, they will eventually help themselves inside. What is the point? Nevertheless, I shouted come in after I rolled my eyes. Here comes the new maid carrying my food. She places it neatly on the table then bowed her head to me. What is the use of doing that? I'm only their king's slut so why the need to bow their heads as if respect?

After doing everything like usual, she left immediately. Maybe she's afraid of getting in touched with me. Scared to suffer the same punishment like Alaria did. Bullshit! The corner of my eyes started to sting as I reminisce the times where Alaria is still breathing with me. How I miss how she stroke my hair as I lay on her lap, tears making their way down my cheeks like how I look now. She comforts me in that way everytime I'm having my mood drop down to lowest. She pamper me with words of encouragement. And eventually, I will fell asleep while listening to her voice.

My older sister..

But those are just pieces of memories now. Alaria is nowhere near coming back because she is burned and turned into ashes. From the mouths of the two guard outside, I came to know why her look is so familiar to me. Alaria is Isabella's daughter. And from what I heard, she's the person who suffered the most after seeing her daughter get beheaded in front of her. Isabella can't do anything as it was V's word and order to kill her child. No matter how much she wanted to stop the execution, she's just like me. We can't do anything against that devil because we are under him. His words are the rules and when he said that it will happen. Eventually, it will.

It made me wonder if Isabella hates V now. She's the only person who's staying truth to V. Serving him with genuineness. Isabella has never hate her king but after what happened to her daughter. Is she still the same? It's such a shame and disappointment that V grew to be like this. He's really blinded by the lies, unable to differentiate the fake and real people. Sigh.

I stared at the food on the table. I already don't like it's physical appearance but I've stopped requesting for new foods. I don't suffer from throwing up anymore so I'm fine with any food. As long as it's edible. Right now, I don't have the appetite to eat so I ignored the food and went back to reading books. My mind is off to somewhere far.

I've calculated how I will escape this hell. Next time the maid enter I will knock her out. She doesn't seem to care about my presence anyway, so it will be easier to sneak behind her back and punch her nape. In that way she'll lose consciousness. Most of the maidservants wear hats to cover their hair, and she is one of them. It makes it easier to copy her look. Yes, I'm going to disguise as her to get out of this place. What I'm eagerly doing right now is praying that the two guards outside will not recognize my face. They hardly see me anyway so I if luck is on my side they will not suspect a thing. For the horns I got it fix, I've actually been preparing for everything. Like I said, I am long awaiting for the right time to do this.

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