Before You (BY: Book 1)

Let Me See You

Stef's POV

This day at the beach was amazing, we're having so much fun, we play in the water, we talk, and laugh and tease each other. And I have to admit that I was a bit jealous when some guys would look at her, I didn't notice women yet, but I think it's just me that can't recognized them just yet, but when they look at her, I swear I never felt so possessive before, I didn't even know that I could be like that if I'm honest, but I very much was, but I didn't say anything for she was so gorgeous, like really, really sexy in her bikini, that of course people were going to look.

Anyway, we were enjoying ourselves, but something seems off with her. Well, not off-off, but I don't know... I feel like something is bothering her and I can't quite understand what.

"You're okay, baby?" I said, as she was in my arms, sit between my legs.

"Yes. You?" she said, softly smiling.

"I am. I really love it when you're in my arms like this." I said sweetly, kissing her cheek as she smiles even more.

"Oh, maybe you should remove your bandana so your hair could dry, babe." I suggest. And I felt her body tenses instantly, as she pulls away a bit and turn to look at me.

"No! I mean... it's not necessary." She said abruptly, which surprised me, for she never acted that weird before as I look at her puzzled.

"Lena?"

"What?"

"What is it? I'm a bit confused, I... did I do something wrong?" I ask for maybe I said or did something, I really don't know. She's always willing to talk about everything usually, which can be frustrated for me, for I'm not one to talk about stuff. But right now, it seems like the roles were reverse.

"No! No, you didn't do anything wrong. You were perfect today, you're perfect everyday anyway." She said smiling, and clearly trying to change subject.

"Wow, it's like watching myself right now. Honey come on! Tell me." I said as she put her head down, it really was like looking into a mirror.

"Lena, love, you know you can tell me anything. You trust me, right?" I said, as she didn't say anything. Silence.

"Lena?" I said, lifting her chin. For my anxiety was growing with the silence.

"It's my hair..."

"Your hair? What's wrong with your hair? It's beautiful." I said even more confused, now I'm lost.

"Stef, you really think that my hair is naturally straight?" well how to answer that is a good question.

"I... I don't know, I never really thought about it..." I said hoping that this wasn't insulting or something for it's not that I don't care, it just that those kinds of thing doesn't matter to me, what's matter is that she's feeling good and happy, so maybe sometimes it makes me distract from other things that might matters to her.

"Can we just drop this and enjoy the rest of our day please?" she said, sighing.

"Baby, come on. You really think that I would find you less attractive because you have curly hair, seriously? I would love you and your hair no matter what because it's YOUR hair Lena." I said seriously, for I wasn't going to drop this. Obviously, it's a matter for her, so even though I don't really understand why, it's a matter for me too.

"You can't understand Stef..." she said defeated.

"You're right, I can't understand that, and I never could. I don't have your experience, I know that people are stupid and that just because you're a black woman, your life is harder than mine, at levels that I could never even imagine. I can't know how you feel exactly, and I wish I could change that but Lena... a very wise woman once said to me that I should be proud of who I'm and not hide it. Your hair is a part of yourself, of your history. You're beautiful and I'm sure you're even more with your natural hair if one day you let me see it but, know that there's nothing you should hide about yourself Lena. Not from me, and not from anyone baby." I said trying to be fair in my words.