For my sister | Negan |

32 - He's fucking pissed

'Tell me, doc, is it safe to transport Sash to Alexandria in this coffin?'

I look first at the coffin, and then at Negan, in total disbelief. They've come up with a plan to intimidate Rick into staying in line.

Everyone's gathered around the thing. Sasha has her arms crossed and stares at the ground. Apparently, it was her idea to stay in the coffin the whole time. Negan only wanted to put her in there once they'd be close. Eugene's here too. He seems a little nervous, fidgeting with his fingers. I suppose that's because he's going to have to tell Rick and everyone else that he's joined Negan and the Saviours.

At least I'll be spared that. Though it would have made an impact to show Rick that the three of us have joined Negan, even though of course it's not true in my case and I'm not sure that it is in the cases of the others either, he doesn't want to risk losing his doctor again. So I'm staying behind.

'I would not recommend any living person to spend a lot of time inside a coffin.'

'Well, it would be a very weird fucking recommendation', Negan says, sounding a little impatient. 'But is it safe? Or is she gonna run out of oxygen or something?'

'I don't think so', I say, looking doubtfully over at Sasha, who won't meet my eye. 'You should be able to last on the air inside the coffin for a few hours. But why risk it? I'd just get in later, to be sure.'

'I want to rest', Sasha says, still staring into nothing. 'Just give me a bottle of water, I'll be fine.'

I glance over at Negan, thinking I might be able to convince him to forbid it, but he's looking at Sasha with a sort of admiration in his eyes.

'You are badass, Sasha', he says appreciatively. Then he turns to one of his many inferiors. 'Get the woman some fucking water.'

I don't understand why she'd choose to be in a coffin for hours. The only reason I can think of is that she just doesn't want to be in Negan's presence. Or maybe she's doing this to punish herself for what she's about to do or something. I'm sure she can't feel comfortable about playing a role in this thing that Negan is setting up to get Rick in line. But at least if everything goes well, nobody will have to die.

'Well, if you're sure...' I say doubtfully. 'Good luck, I guess.'

She finally lifts her eyes and looks at me. The look in them scares me. Fierce, but somehow also empty.

'Good luck to you, too', she says.

I shift a little uncomfortably on my feet. What does that mean? Good luck with what? I'll be staying here, far away from any danger.

Negan claps hus hands, startling me a little. I can tell he's excited about this trip to Alexandria. I'm sure he can't wait to show Rick who's boss again.

'Then we're all good to go', he says cheerfully. 'Thanks doc, can't wait to see you once we get back.'

He winks at me for a second, so I quickly turn away to hide the color in my face. After I left Negan yesterday to go to my room, I fell fast asleep and after getting some rest and being able to think a little more clearly, everything that happened with Negan didn't seem like the smartest thing to do anymore. But of course, I did promise him we might have some fun if he pulls through and really doesn't kill anybody. I'm sure he won't forget about that. And I guess a part of me doesn't want him to.

I take a last look at Sasha before I head inside with a bit of a knot in my stomach. I don't feel good about any of this. Who knows if Negan will keep his promise. But I did what I could by talking to him and there's nothing else I can do right now.