Tremble Part 4

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WC: 1335

Wei Wuxian called out to the junior's boat, "What's going on?"

The sight of the two of them always made Lan Sizhui feel like even the most difficult of situations could be resolved. Lan Tian however, felt quite the opposite. So, when Lan Sizhui shouted over joyed, "Hanguang-jun! Wei-qianbei!" Lan Tian rolled their eyes. "Come over, quick!"

Lan Tian mumbled quickly, "Why'd you have to call them?" Lan Tian had this feeling that those two were only going to make things worse.

Lan Wangji wrapped his arm around Wei Wuxian's waist and brought him onto Bichen.

Jin Ling flinched slightly as Lan Tian pulled him closer sighing. "I just want to go home." He whispered under his breath. Jin Ling placed his hand behind Lan Tian's head and held him closer to his chest. Something tugged at Jin Ling's heart, he knew Lan Tian hated situations like this and even showing affection around so many people, but why were they suddenly like this?

"We can go home soon." Jin Ling knew they only thing that he could offer Lan Tian was empty promises but he did it anyways.

Wei Wuxian began questioning the group and Lan Tian felt Jin Ling grow stiff as he pushed them away lightly. "Wen Ning, what's going on? Didn't you say you were just gonna take a gander?"

"I'm sorry, gongzi," Wen Ning said. "It's my fault. I couldn't hold back..."

Jin Ling started at Wen Ning, "Drop the act!" he roared deeply.

"Jin Ling." Wei Wuxian said, "calm..."

"No! I won't!" Jin Ling said. Wei Wuxian was about to say more, but Jin Ling unexpectedly burst into tears.

Lan Tian froze for a moment before running to him. He clutched his sword in his chest as Lan Tian stood beside him rubbing his back.

As tears streamed down his face, Jin Ling's voice was loud and furious between sobs. "This my dad's sword. I..."

That sword was the one and only thing his parents left him.

Lan Tian silently embraced him hiding his face from the crowd. They began to hum a soft melody that only the two of them could hear as they stood unmoving in front of the crowd of their peers.

A voice suddenly rang out from across the river just then. "A-Ling!"

Five or six large boats surrounded their own, each packed full of cultivators and a Clan leader standing on the bow. The Jiang Clan of Yunmeng's boat was the closest, with only a few meters between them. Jian Cheng stood at the ship's rail.

The moment Jin Ling saw his uncle through his teary eyes and Lan Tian's embrace, he sniffled as Lan Tian wiped his face quickly. He looked that way, then gritted his teeth before glancing at Lan Tian's soft smile and shrug, before flying over on his sword and landing beside Jiang Cheng.

Lan Tian gave Lan Sizhui, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji a side glance before huffing, "I had it under control, you just had to make it worse didn't you?" They pushed their way through the crowd to the other side of the boat and once again sat with their legs dangling mindlessly over the edge.

As Lan Tian sat alone on the edge of the boat wishing to be anywhere else. They truly hated loud, busy places more than most other things in the world. If it was too loud they couldn't think, and if they couldn't think, they became hyper aware of every pair of eyes that were staring holes into their soul.

Out of the corner of their eyes Lan Tian caught a glimpse of Wei Wuxian's limp figure being carried into the ships cabin. They quickly concluded that it was of no concern as their father seemed to only be moderately worried at the moment. The more Lan Tian thought about his father and Wei Wuxian's relationship, the emptier they felt.

Lan Tian was painfully aware that the only reasons the two of them could be together was their overwhelming power and indifference about other's opinions. He knew that Jin Ling and him had none

of that. They were both extremely aware of other's opinions and neither of them had grown strong enough to be unchallenged. Sometimes they wondered if there was even a point to trying. They were both young and Lan Tian was unsure if either of them even knew what love felt like to begin with.

As their hands turned white while gripping the side of the boat, Lan Tian scoffed. Even though all these thoughts dragged their nails along their brain, ripping open their thoughts, they just couldn't shake this feeling in their chest. The muscles around their heart began to contract as they mentally recalled every inch of Jin Ling from his bright smile that only reached his eyes when they were alone, to the defined contours of his calves. His smooth light voice soothed their ragged mind as it always did when they were alone. The smell of water lilies and trees took over their senses reminding them of the days they would run away as kids. If they closed their eyes, Lan Tian could almost feel two large arms embrace them as soft kisses were planted on their head.

"A-Tian," Lan Tian's head shot up as a cold hand touched their shoulder, "Are you going to go in too?" Wen Ning asked motioning to the cabin containing Wei Wuxian under Lan Wangji's watchful eyes.

"Dunno." He shrugged stretching a little before crossing their arms.

Wen Ning moved to a nearby couch, "Are you okay kiddo?" he asked looking back at them.

Lan Tian stopped for a moment before shrugging, "Dunno."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Lan Tian shook his head before turning towards the cabin and entering the room.

"Are you happy?" They watched as Lan Wangji pulled Wei Wuxian upright and into his embrace.

The sides of Lan Wangji's lips slightly curled up, "Yes."

Lan Tian let out a small laugh as they looked down at their feet. "Was it worth it?" Lan Wangji cocked his head to the side as Wei Wuxian burrowed into his chest, "All of the struggle, worry, heartache, pain, every, was it worth it?"

Lan Wangji motioned Lan Tian over to sit on the bed beside him and the sleeping Wei Wuxian, "Sometimes, no. But at times like this, yes." Lan Tian squeezed Lan Wangji's hand.

They took a deep breath, their voice wavering, "Sometimes I don't think it will ever get better. There are times when my heart feels like its overflowing and the world it so bright! Then, he's gone and I wonder if I even feel anything. It's like my heart is void and I just want to lay down and never get back up again." Tears began marking Lan Tian's face as their body shook ever so slightly.

"When your with him it feels like you could do anything. But when he goes away, you feel aimless and like you never even existed in the first place. Even the thought of never seeing him chills you to the core, right?" A single small glistening line shined on Lan Wangji's face as he pulled both Wei Wuxian and Lan Tian closer.

"D...dad, I..." Lan Tian struggled to put words together. They couldn't remember the last time Lan Wangji cried, the sight froze every train of thought in Lan Tian's head.

Lan Wangji chuckle lightly, "When we get to Lotus Peer you and Jin Ling should go train together." A small smile formed on his face, "Talk to him. You'll figure it out soon enough. Now go. Make friends, I know you're somewhat lacking in that particular area."

"Hey! I heard you were no better." Lan Tian pouted as they were pushed out of the room.

"You don't always have to try and be like me, or Wei Ying for that matter." The soft chuckle and light expression that washed over Lan Wangji's face filled Lan Tian with sense of comfort and warmth. "Okay, okay. And if you two end up doing anything, remember to be quiet. You wouldn't want to scar our innocent minds." Lan Tian winked before escaping out the cabin door.

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