Forgiving Him is a Sin

41

(two weeks later)
Milena POV

I place the tray on the table in the yard, sitting as I wait for Stefano. The weather seems to be getting warmer as days go by, which reminds me of all the work I had planned for this year. So many plans, so many wishes, so many people... I lost everything.

Stefano hasn't touched me ever since that night. I know for a fact that it has something to do with my cries at the church. He seems to be distancing himself from me. I know I should be happy, I would have been happy had this happened two weeks ago, but right now... I'm disappointed.

Sometimes I'd look into my naked reflection in the mirror and see his biting marks disappear gradually. I would remember the tingling sensation I felt when he was biting, sucking, and kissing my body. I know I have sinned, I have repented, but I can't get it out of my mind. I can't control my heart and mind.

The good thing is that we built some kind of connection after that. He hasn't yelled at me or refused my requests. One of his trusted men named Massimo takes me to church every other day. He was an unfamiliar face so I thought maybe he was the one Tony kidnapped, but I could be wrong. He's not talkative and I don't particularly enjoy chatting with unknown men.
Henry now comes here every day with a laptop, he now works for Stefano. He hasn't said anything about Tony and neither have I, since there are always guards watching us.

For a few days, I saw Stefano sitting here by himself, doing nothing. So I joined him with his coffee and my warm milk. We'd sit and say nothing, just stare into the void. But one day, I brought him coffee outside and he didn't come, so I sat there, drinking alone. He found out about it the next day but didn't say anything. I continued to do the same thing every day, it became like a routine for us. Until one morning, he told me he wouldn't join me, that I shouldn't wait for him.

Simple words, but it made me happy. I'm starting to get used to him, but it hurts... the fact that he won't touch me... it hurts.

I'm brought out of my deep thoughts as Stefano joins me, sitting beside me while taking his cup of coffee. I have a feeling he knows everything by now. Who I really am, how he caught the wrong person. I feel like he's not letting me go just because he doesn't want to kill me.

"So what's the plan?" I have the courage, I have the opportunity... why not ask?

"About?" His head slightly turns to face me.

"The torturing stopped, you're no longer questioning me, you give me the things I want. What's the plan? Should I get ready to die anytime soon?"

He stays quiet, as I sip on my drink, staring into nature.

"I'm busy dealing with something, I haven't forgotten your papa. Once I'm done with this, I'll take care of that. Don't forget that you're my hostage."

"So do you sleep in the same bed as all your hostages?" I reply sarcastically. I sure hope not.

I turn to face him but all he gives me is a smile, and then he places his cup down and stands up.

It's unfinished. A new reminder Milena, don't talk!

"Eddy will take you to church today, I need Massimo with me."

Eddy?

"Who's Eddy?" I stand up, frowning at the unfamiliar name. It can't be the guy I think it is, can it?

"Eduardo, the one usually standing at the left corner."

I blink a few times, it's him! It's the same perverted guy who only stares at me when Stefano isn't around. I grab Stefano's sleeve and stare into his eyes, hoping he can read me. I know if I say anything it would only make things worse. It's just a feeling I have towards the guy, I don't know if he actually has any bad intentions. I might destroy an innocent man's life. All I can do is try and change Stefano's mind.

"C-can... can Johnny..." I try to speak but it's a little hard, my impressive imagination won't allow the words to come out.

"No, Johnny's busy with something else. What's wrong?" he looks down at me with confusion. At least he can tell something's wrong.

"Nothing. Drive safely." I let the words out fast, then put our cups in the tray and walked back inside.

Johnny's attitude changed towards me after Stefano shot Champ on the plane, but at least I know he has no bad intentions. This Eddy guy looks nothing like a trustworthy person. I pray that I'm wrong.

As it became the time for church I grabbed my headscarf and walked outside. The same guard I was expecting is leaning on the car with his hand on his phone waiting for me. He's an average dark-skinned guy, looking to be in his mid-30s with cleanly shaved hair and lots of tattoos.

He lifts his head after hearing the clicking sound of my heels, then hurriedly places his phone back into his inner jacket pocket and opens the back door of the car for me. During the ride, he asked some trivial questions about the weather, the church, politics, and so on. And I gave short answers like ah, yes, I see, hum, and others.

I was counting the seconds for us to reach there, and I noticed we got there 10 minutes later than when Massimo drove. I don't know if that was intentional or not, but I don't have a good feeling.

Father Julio welcomed me warmly, as usual, he and I became very close after our first meeting. He always comes outside to greet me and lead me inside when I come out of the car. We walk inside do our usual chats and read the Bible. I never want this time to end, talking to Father Julio and reading the bible lightens the weight of my heart.

Two hours later, I walked out of the church after forcing Father Julio to not accompany me out since he said wasn't feeling well. I see the car, but no sign of the guard. The car is locked and there's no one around.

"Eddy!" I call him a few times, but no answer.

"Hi kitty." I jump at the sound of Stefano's deep voice, sneaking from behind.

"When did you get here?" I ask him with my hand on my beating heart.

"Did I scare you?" he just smiles with his hands behind his back.

"Come on, we'll drive you back." He places his hand on my back and leads me to the street.

I see Massimo driving and parking the car close to us.

"What about Eddy?" I ask, I'm not worried about him but I'm curious.

"I'll let him know. Come on." I feel him rushing me into the back seat.

I'm not sure what's going on, but something doesn't feel right...