Fade in to Past Church, Rayner, Caboose and Tucker standing in front of the tombstones near Blue Base, with Future Church watching from afar
Past Church: Um... Maybe somebody should say something.
Tucker: Okay, go ahead.
Past Church: Not me, jackass. I'm not gonna eulogize myself.
Tucker: What? Why not, I eulogize myself all the time. Wait... I think I don't know what the word eulogize means.
Church: How about you Rayner?
Rayner: Yeaaah... uh, no, yeah, no I'm not really good with funerals.
Caboose: Wait, I know how to do this- Dearly beloved
Past Church: No, shut him up, seriously. Shut him up.
Caboose: We are gathered here, today, to witness, the joining together of Tex, and Church, in eternalness together, smuh- speak now! Or forever, rest in peace! With liberty, and justice, for all. The end.
Tucker: Man this funeral is laaaame. If you need me I'll be over by my rock.
Past Church: Hey Tucker, can I have a piggy-back ride back to base?
Tucker: No, nonono, I fell for that shit last time, I'm not doing that. That metal suit is like eight thousand pounds.
Past Church: Come on, one more piggy-back ride's not gonna kill ya. I'm in mourning here. (to Rayner) Pretty please.
Rayner: *sigh* Just this once.
Cut to Future Church
Past Church: Haha! Thanks man. I've been through so much. Also can you help me paint my body blue?
Future Church: Okay. I may not have been able to save myself or Tex, but I still have time to save everybody else if I can just keep the A.I. from getting into Doc, prevent Lopez and Sheila from forming their Robot Army, and somehow figure out a way to stop the war between the Reds and the Blues all together. Huh. What if I... Yeah I'm gonna need some help on this one.
Cut to past Church, Rayner and Tucker trying to activate the repair function in episode 23
Past Church: Hurhoor... Oh! Hey!
Tucker: Found it?
Past Church: Nah, no wait. All I found was the time and temperature function. It is currently twenty-six degrees, by the way.
Tucker: What? It's not twenty-six degrees out here, that's freezing.
Future Church runs by inside the base, and the camera conveniently cuts to him there
Future Church: Where the hell is that contact info for Blue Command. We really need to standardize the way we handle our information.
Back outside
Tucker: Naw dude, it's more like a ...switch.
Rayner: (looks at the switch) It's so small you can almost miss it.
Past Church: Well, give it a flip.
Tucker: I don't wanna flip it.
Back inside to Future Church standing in front of “Cabose's Importent Lists of Stuf”
Future Church: Okay, here we go.
Radio sounds
Future Church: Come in Blue Command, do you read me.
YOU ARE READING
Red vs Blue : Mirage
HumorFormer mercenary Kyle Rayner has lived a rough life. After retiring from mercenary work he sought to live a normal life, but soon learns how hard it is to adjust to civilian life after all the grueling missions he's been on. So, he does the next bes...
