Chapter 20

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Castiel's p.o.v

Cas was pacing the private waiting area the staff had pushed them into as they rushed Dean off to surgery. Cas was apparently 'too loud and using foul language'. Benny was sitting in a chair going from watching him, to texting with the rest of their guys who were currently torturing the fuck out of the man who stabbed Dean. Cas had thought the message Dean had sent him was in regard to Jacob, but really Dean had seen the would be attacker and tried to bring it to his attention.

Once again Jacob had ruined something in his life. But then, an hour later, Cas found out Jacob had zero involvement in this, and he felt a weight settle on his shoulders. He'd forced Dean to stand in the front, wanting to show him off like some prized piece of art just to piss of John fucking Winchester.

The man who attacked them was the guy he'd had fired and beaten for letting Dean slip under the water in the hot tub the day after the first time he'd drugged him. Pissed at being jobless, losing his apartment, and of course being beaten, he got high and got the bright idea to stage an attack on Cas as retribution. And freaking Dean being nothing like his father stepped between them to keep him from getting hurt.

He was worried about the wound to his gut, but his fucking hand from holding onto that blade to keep it from doing more damage to him was wrecked. Cas had seen the tendons of his fingers as he'd tried to stop his bleeding on the way to the hospital. The stupid god damn idiot might die because he was what, being noble? Or possibly just stepping in front of danger in hopes of dying to get out of this, whatever this was between them?

He sat down heavily with a huff and rubbed at his face. He'd washed his hands, but his nails were still stained red with Dean's blood. None of this was supposed to turn out this way. He was supposed to take Dean, own him, humiliate John, possibly kill Dean. But instead, he ended up liking the guy? They'd barely had any normal conversations together, barely knew anything about each other, had some fucked up nights together. But he'd grown to like having Dean waiting at his home for him, liked getting him flustered, liked what little he'd helped him, liked the snarky attitude Dean would sometimes throw at him.

And he was a fool for liking him. Not because of any of the crime politics attached to them. But because Dean would never feel the same for him. He'd abducted him, hit him, drugged him, made him do sexual things he didn't want to do. Dean should hate him, but Cas never felt like he truly did, when he drugged him maybe, but not any other time.

"You okay there, boss?" Benny finally spoke up to him.

Cas lifted his head from his hands. "I swear to god you better order them not to kill that fucker. I need to be the one to end him."

Benny nodded, "Already passed that message along the first time you said it an hour ago. Are you okay is what I asked."

Cas almost laughed. Besides his brothers, only Benny would ever have the nerve to talk to him like that. "I don't know." Cas answered truthfully.

Just then, a doctor knocked and entered the waiting area, "Uh, Mr. Novak?" He asked, Cas standing and nodding. "He's out of his first surgery. We focused on getting the knife wound repaired first per our trauma protocols. We need him stabilized before focusing on anything else, and he's pulled through that. Now we just wait for him to stabilize and get some strength back, and then we'll do another surgery  to focus on his hand."

"You haven't fixed his god damn hand yet?" Cas snapped at the man.

The doctor backed up a little, "Well, his life seemed like the most important thing at the time. The hand will come next."

Cas advanced on the man grabbing him by his scrubs and pushing him back against the door, "If his hand isn't picture fucking perfect and fully functional I'm holding you personally accountable, got it?"

The doctor quickly nodded as Cas released him, the door opening and snapping shut as he left. "I'm gonna take your answer to my earlier question as a no then." Benny spoke up, Cas glaring at him.

Cas made his way to Dean's room, the circles under his eyes dark against his too pale skin. His hand was wrapped and in some kind of device keeping it suspended in the air above his body, and he was wearing oxygen under his nose. Cas was a little relieved he wasn't on a vent or anything but that didn't mean Dean wasn't bad off. He sat in the chair next to the bed and grabbed for Dean's good hand giving it a squeeze and worrying at how cold it was.

Dean's p.o.v

Dean was again stuck in his nightmare, and he'd felt like he'd been in it for longer than usual. He dreamed over and over of his time with the Styne's. Now that he had seen Jacob he had a face to one of the unknown men that would beat him, but he knew after hearing him talk at Castiel's place that he wasn't the one who raped him. It didn't make his nightmare any easier having a face to place. He was still cold, still got beaten, still got assaulted, over and over crying out and begging for them to just kill him, but they never did.

Through his nightmares he heard a whisper though on about the tenth cycle of reliving his past. He kept trying to focus on it as his face got bashed in and his fingers broken. But he couldn't hear anything except his own crying and screams during the assault. Then when he was back to being beaten he heard it again and he focused on it.

"You're not there. You're not there." He heard. Strange. That's never happened before. He kept listening for it, "you escaped." It said. Did he? "It's not happening anymore."

Dean fought to wake up, to find that whisper and hold on to it and see that what it was saying was true. He blinked his eyes open, his eyelids feeling like sandpaper as he kept blinking, his throat not feeling any better. He looked down and found the source of the whispering. Castiel beside him in his bed, gingerly holding on to him, his head on his shoulder whispering to him "You're not there. You escaped. It's not happening anymore."

He tried to move but the pain in his side shot through him like a lightening bolt so instead he just said, "Castiel?"

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