Love for love's sake [ENG TRANS]

Chapter 14

[Tae Myeongha's POV]

If you didn't take care of your home, the electricity would be shut off quickly, dust would accumulate, and it would lose its vitality. Humans were no different. The present 18-year-old Cha Yeowoon, I may have thought too simply. He had spent months alone beside his only family that was struggling with an illness, then coming back to an empty home alone, with nothing okay, not even one thing he liked.

"Now that I'm not going to run anymore... Sunbae, you should leave."

"Cha Yeowoon."

Cha Yeowoon's misty eyes didn't shed a single tear. The eyes that were gazing at me so clearly appeared red in the dim light. It gave the illusion that it was filled with blood.

"You're really clumsy too."

It reminded me of myself when I was 19. My grandmother was angry at me because she was worried, and there were people who approached me out of concern, but I was tired of it all. Miserable and angry, I thought I was alone. I thought I would always be alone.

I felt as if the whole world hated me. I wanted to feel more hatred toward everyone than they felt toward me. I didn't want anyone to want me. I didn't want to become desperate. I didn't want to be hurt. I didn't want to be abandoned. I really, really hated myself. I abandoned myself every day, but I had to live with myself every day.

"Get some rest."

I turned around and put on my sneakers. The sunlight outside the front door poured down. As my shadow lengthened under my feet, my steps began to feel sticky. When I returned with a hefty bag, the front door of the rooftop room was slightly open. I wondered if something had happened. My heart raced, and I pushed the door open, forgetting the weight on my wrist.

"Cha Yeo...!"

Cha Yeowoon was curled up in the same place as before. Nothing had changed. I belatedly realized that I might not have properly closed the door when I left. As I approached him, his slightly trembling shoulders stopped.

"Yeowoon."

A tear-stained face turned toward me. The intertwined eyelashes blinked in disbelief. Tears that were still in the corners of his eyes streamed down. It hadn't even been 20 minutes since I left, why was his condition like this? I came as quickly as I could. I wanted to scold myself, but his condition seemed so serious that I didn't dare to say anything. Imagining him crying in this place made my heart ache.

"...Why did you come back?"

"Didn't I just go to buy this?"

When I showed the bag hanging on my wrist, Cha Yeowoon's eyebrows twitched.

"I told you to wait because I was going to buy you porridge."

"Haa..."

"The gas hasn't been shut off, has it? I'll warm it up for you."

"I'm not eating."

"Stop being stubborn. Do you want to wash your face? Your eyes are swollen."

"...What kind of porridge did you buy?"

"Vegetable porridge."

Cha Yeowoon scrambled to the bathroom while I was unloading the porridge, canned food, ramen, instant rice, and some dried food onto the kitchen. If electricity was completely shut off, it would mean that he hadn't paid in three months. Even if the capital was included in the maintenance fee, he wouldn't have paid for just electricity alone, so gas was likely to be shut off soon.

After making him eat, I'll have him sit down and look at the bills. Should I light a candle or something? It was going to be dark soon. I became uneasy as I listened to the sound of water.
As I heated up the porridge in a pot and went to get a spoon, I noticed the utensil box next to the sink. Seeing the dust collected on top of it, a sigh escaped my lips. I guess he hadn't been eating at home. Then what had he been eating?