Permanent Rebellion

The Words

POV: Lucifer

I went through the portal that lead to the Hotel lobby. I held Adam's notebook in one arm, cane in my other. I rarely presented casually but I was too tired to keep up appearances. "Dad!" Charlie walked into the lobby, Vaggie in tow on her heels. "Hey kiddo, I'm sorry about not replying to you for so long..." he smiled tiredly as she came up and gave me a hug. "Can we talk privately before talking with the others please?" I looked at her. She nodded but looked so worried. "Sure thing, let's head to the little meeting room upstairs then..." she lead the way with Vaggie as I followed behind.

We entered the room and we all sat at the table. I took a deep breath and placed the notebook in front of her. She tilted her head as did Vaggie. "That's Adam's hand writing, can tell immediately by those dumb doodles" she snorted a little. "About Adam..." I began which brought their attention back to me. "Vaggie...you told Ace about how he had these episodes in heaven...remember?" I asked and she nodded cautiously. "Well...Adam was depressed...very much so...that uhm..." I cleared my throat and sighed. "He planned to commit suicide...Ace found a receipt from a local drug store listing some high dosage sleep medication he's been taking, alcohol, a notebook and a pen...Adam must of purchased this about 2 months ago....during the Vees incident...he's been writing down what he never tell Ace or I in that notebook....it's also where he wrote his last letters to Ace and I..." I watched Charlie's face falter into despair, it was honestly hard to watch, even Vaggie looked crushed.

"Dad is he?..." "No...Ace and I barely got there in time...he knew he wouldn't die permanently only on the OD and mix of alcohol so he stole one of Ace's angelic steel knifes...when we got to him, he downed the whole bottom of the meds and half the bottle of whiskey, the blade just over his arm. He moved suddenly at seeing and hearing us, he sliced into his arm..." I rubbed my face and glanced at them both. Charlie had her mouth covered by her hands and Vaggie kept her eye locked on the floor. "Luckily I've been teaching Ace my healing magic, so have some of the Overlords...he managed to purify the wound and stop the bleeding completely from the cut...only thing left was to get him to throw up the pills...so I forced him to with my hand...his body soon feel into a coma like state...probably recovering on its own." I finished but tapped the cover of the notebook.

"You can read it if you'd like...you can read his last letter to me...he mentioned you...Vaggie and the others" I offered and sat back in the chair I was sitting in. The girls both looked at each other before opening the journal and began to read. Charlie's face held many emotions, as did Vaggie not realizing that this was Adam in a different light than she's always seen him in. They finally turned to the last pages. "Wait...this one was torn from the book..." "That was Ace's letter...I let him read it after we came back home, after Adam was taken to the infirmary...while I was wallowing in my workshop he was tearing up the training room...I thought he might of transformed but...no he just let out his emotions...in a destructive way like Adam tends to...the mirror was shattered...Ace hurt himself in his whirlwind of emotions..." I sighed and I smiled holding my hands up. "He's okay though, he has his wrist and hand in a brace that's all...but I don't know if Ace still has it on him or he threw it away" I rested my chin in the palm of one of my hands leaning over the table.

The girls read Adam's letter to me and Charlie started to cry, Vaggie holding back her tears as she comforted my daughter. "He's not a burden dad...he's helped this hotel more than he knows!" She cried out. "Well when he wakes up...be sure to come by and tell him that okay? You too Vaggie right?" I smiled sadly at her. She nodded and sniffled a little. "Let the others know, get them to understand...and even though you can treat him with fragile hands...don't suffocate him either, ya know?" I got up and placed a hand on my daughter's head. "We will dad, I promise" she looked up at me wiping her tears. "That's my girl, I need to go back to them okay?" I placed a kiss on top of her head before taking my leave.

I let out a big sigh as I made my way to the infirmary once more. I was greeted with Adam being free from all the tubes and extra machines. Ace was asleep next to him once more. I leaned over spotting the piece of crumpled paper held tightly in his injured hand. I never did read Ace's letter...I took it out of his hand gently as to not wake him. I held it in my hands as I read it, my heart aching as I read the words...he knew Ace so viscerally...I knew that their bond was more tight knit than his and Adam's but I loved them all the same regardless...I wasn't about to let envy take me like that towards them...not after everything they've all been through together...

I replaced the paper in Ace's hand lightly. I moved over to Adam, sitting next to him, taking his hand in mine. "Hey bud...I told Charlie and Vaggie about what happened...don't worry you are still totally bad ass in their eyes...and in mine...and Ace's...maybe this time around you'll lean on us a bit okay? Fuck Adam...I'm sorry...I love you damn it...you bring so much light to everything...to any room you walk into...every idea you come up with...I just...I wish we can redo...everything...I wish I had...I regret a lot but...I can't change history...or the past...so let write the future huh? Together right?" I let a few stray tears fall as I held his hand to my cheek, sniffling as I sat there quietly for a long time before getting up to leave to start on some projects in my workshop but placing a kiss on Adam's lips gently before actually leaving.