Secret Desire (Nyssara FanFic)

The Choice

Nyssa removed the bullet from her side and stitched herself up without even flinching. She then took some herbs to speed her recovery. She walked over to her window and looked out into the vast star lit sky. She was contemplating on what she was really going to do. Would she really give up on her after all they had shared? Would she keep fighting and wait until she realizes that they should be together? She has to do what's best for Sara, but she too wasn't sure what that was.

Wanting to clear her head, she went on to train the moment she woke up, not caring if her stitches open up.

"Your father wants us back tomorrow." Alec interrupted.

"You told him what happened."

"He should be aware of what you're getting yourself into here."

"This is my life."

"Your life is to the League."

It was true for most parts of her life, but ever since she met Sara, it all changed for her. She wanted something more outside of that life. More specifically, she wanted to just be with Sara. It doesn't matter what her life would be as long as she has her by her side. And she doesn't know if she could have that, have her, or even if she should.

She kept punching and kicking the bag until her stitches popped and bled again. She knew she shouldn't be angry and frustrated. It wasn't the life for her in the first place. She just kept pushing and holding onto it.

She wants to see her, talk to her, and hold her, even for one last time, but she's afraid that she might not want to ever let go again. She wants her to let her stay. She can keep a distance if that's what she wants, but she hopes she would let her stay. She no longer can imagine her life without her.

She doesn't know what to do, whether to follow the League or her heart. The life she has had as far as she could remember or the life she doesn't even know she deserves.

She grabbed her phone and dialed.

"Hello."

"Hey, Nyssa. You okay?" Rebecca responded at the other end of the line.

"I'll be fine. How are you holding up?"

"Still trying to get a grip on things. You've vaguely told me about it but seeing you do it is just something else."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. You saved our lives."

"By the way, I'm leaving earlier than expected. I'm leaving tomorrow."

"Oh."

"Can you tell her I said goodbye? Tell her that I would keep my promise."

"Ok."

"Thanks."

"Why don't you call her?"

"I don't know if I can talk to her right now. Goodbye, Rebecca."

"Be safe."

"I'll do my best."

Nyssa hung up and she knew that Rebecca would later on call Sara and tell her about it. It was true that she can't talk to her right now. She doesn't know what she was going to say to her. She wants to see her but she's afraid of what would happen, what she would say to her.

She went up to her room and tended to her wound again. She looked at it closely. A wound she would never forget. A wound she got saving her love. A love she might have lost in the process.

Just as Nyssa had predicted, Rebecca called Sara right after she hung up, but she didn't tell her over the phone. She asked her to come over to her house so they could talk properly, and so that Sara won't be able to evade her.