What She's Doing Now (Sequel to The Great Pretenders)

Apologize

By One Republic

I'm holding on your rope
Got me ten feet off the ground
And I'm hearing what you say, but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around, and say

That it's too late to apologize, it's too late

Lucy didn't hesitate to walk into the dressing room angrily. Her face was red and hot from the what Charlie and Kate had told her Matt had said in the radio station interview.

"Hey Luce," Brian said amiably as he sat on the leather couch. She turned to glare and he chuckled. He knew he was in for a show. 

Matt turned just as she approached "What the fuck was that all about?" she demanded.

"I didn't mean..."

"You didn't mean to what? Basically say Charlie was nobody?" she yelled.

Zacky and Arin looked embarrassed for Matt but they were almost to scared to move. Johnny was as amused as Brian as he joined him on the sofa.

"That's not what I meant. She misunderstood..."

"She misunderstood," she said louder pushing Matt with one hand "Misunderstood that she was just some kid...like one you picked up off the street to hang out with your stupid band."

"It's not like I could blurt out who she was," Matt raised his hands defensively "He was basically accusing me of cheating on my wife."

"Which you DID," Lucy retorted and all the guys recoiled.

Matt's eyebrows crashed together "Jesus fucking Christ, Lucy, why don't you yell that shit louder? I don't think they heard you down in Houston."

"Like they don't already know," she blurted gesturing toward the guys "Like you all didn't spread that shit like wildfire the minute I stepped out of the room." She turned to glare at Zacky who lifted his hands in surrender. 

Matt looked sheepish "I'm sorry. It's just not the way I wanted the news to come out."

"I knew this would happen," she countered "I knew you'd hurt her feelings. I never should have told her."

"What's the supposed to mean?" he said feeling his own anger rising "I made a mistake. I didn't mean to hurt her."

"You didn't even think of her!" she yelled.

"Come on you two," Zacky tried to be the voice of reason "The girls have to be here somewhere. You shouldn't get into this here."

Lucy turned on him, her blue eyes blazing "No Zacky, they aren't anywhere around. Charlie was so upset, she's on the bus puking her guts out. "

"Aww fuck," Matt said miserably. This wasn't what he wanted.

She turned back to him "Is that the best you've got?"

"Come on guys," Johnny interjected "Isn't there a rule that says you can't fight after a kick ass show?"

Neither of them paid him any attention.

"Lucy, you have to know that I didn't mean it. I just wasn't ready."

"That's exactly right, Sanders," she spat "You weren't ready. You weren't ready back then and you sure as hell aren't ready now. That's EXACTLY why I didn't tell you in the first place. You're so self absorbed and you only think about what you want instead of what everyone else wants. That's the reason your marriage to Val failed. That's the reason I ran away from you...because I knew...it's always about you."

She was trembling with anger, every fiber and nerve in her body on alert. When Brian placed his hand on her shoulder, she almost punched him.

"Hey, Luce," Brian said in a low soothing voice "Let's not do this here. We don't want to make a scene."

Her eyes narrowed and her eyebrows crashed together "If you don't get your God damned hand off of me, Brian, you won't just get a scene. You'll get a whole fucking Broadway musical."

As a guitarist he figured his hands were important and Brian pulled his back quickly. She practically growled at him until he moved back to the couch.

"Lucy," Matt rasped "I'm so sorry.  Please..."

"No," she cut him off "we're done here. I'm taking the girls home."

"You can't take her home," Matt said loudly

Her nostrils flared "She's my daughter. I can take her anywhere I damn well please."

"She's my daughter too," Matt thundered in reply finally unleashing some anger moving  dangerously closer to her face.

Lucy could feel her pulse race. She'd seen Matt angry once or twice but she'd never been on the receiving end and even though it made her a little scared, it also thrilled her.

He took a step closer and she took a step back. "You can't be her father when it's convenient for you," she said regaining her space. "That's not how being a parent works. She wants to go home so I'm taking her home. Whatever happens next is her choice."

"Her choice?" He moved closer again almost as if drawn to her. He could feel her trembling but she didn't seem afraid. It was almost electric. The urge to touch her was overwhelming but she killed it with her next words.

"Yeah that means if she chooses she never wants to see you again, you have to deal with it."

Before he could reply, she pushed past him to get out of the room, purposely slamming the door after her. She felt the sudden urge to cry. The tears welled up and then spilled silently down her cheeks. She jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder but this time, she didn't threaten the owner.

Zacky's serene green eyes were staring at her "Don't cry, Luce. Please don't cry."

She sighed as she gave him a half smile to try to compose herself and he leaned over to hug her. He smelled vaguely like cigarette smoke, sweat and butterscotch, an interesting combination. The sweet scent reminded Lucy of her grandmother's house and it made her feel safe and warm. She inhaled deeply and then sighed as he released her.

"Don't go, Lucy. He doesn't want that," Zacky explained "And Charlie...I'm sure she doesn't want that either."

"I can't have her here to get hurt, Zacky," she said softly "She was really upset."

He nodded "I'm sure she was but he fucked up. He needs the chance to apologize and be forgiven."

"It's her choice Zack," Lucy replied "And right now she wants to go home."

"And tomorrow she may feel differently," he continued "Just give her a chance. Let her sleep on it."

She sighed. What was the right thing to do here?