I hate you hemmings ➳ l.h

31

Clarissa's POV

I was soon sat next to Luke in the crowd. We were surprisingly in the front row. Not that I was complaining, it gave us the perfect view of the show.

Luke's performance was the last event of the night. The awards I've been nominated for will be shown more towards the middle of it, so at least I'll be able to have Luke by my side. Being nominated is great and all... but I really want to win. Luke and I could have one of those cute scenes where my name is called and he gets up and hugs me before I make my way onto the stage. That'd be a perfect scene.

"I met Taylor Swift! She gave me her number as well!" I squealed into Luke's ear. He flashed me a quick smile before drawing his attention back towards the stage.

Awards were being called out left and right. Luke held onto my hand the whole time, giving me a sense of comfort. Whenever I was in his arms I felt safe.

"Now we have the nominees for Best New Artist!" The announcer spoke. I instantly squeezed Luke's hand. This was one of the awards I was nominated for.

"Clarissa Winters!" I felt the lump grow in my throat. My music video for The Way played for a couple of seconds before moving on to the next people nominated.

"And the winner is... Clarissa Winters!" He yelled, making me freeze right in my seat.

I won.

A huge grin formed across my face as I got up to give Luke a hug. I made my way onto the stage, being handed a trophy straight away.

"I just want to say thank you so much to anyone who voted for me or who has supported me throughout this journey. I love my fans so much, I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you! I'd also like to thank my mother for being so supportive of me as well. Thank you thank you thank you." I smiled, wiping a tear from my eye.

This doesn't feel real. It all seemed to happen in slow motion.

The crowd roared, as I found myself back into my seat in the audience. I can't believe I've just won an award. None of it feels real. First I performed and everyone loved it. Then Taylor swift congratulated me, asked for a picture, and gave me her number. Then I won the award for best new artist over other great amazing singers who could've easily beaten me.

Luke kept telling me how proud he was over and over. I just want the best for his band as well, you know? It was his dream before it was mine and he deserves the fame more than I do. You can see how much he loves performing just the by the look in his eye when he steps on stage.

Luke's POV

Before I could comprehend anything going on, it was time for me to head back stage to prepare for my performance.

Clarissa had won an award, and I was truly proud of her. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't wished it had been me wining the award, however. I feel so ashamed to feel that way. I just can't help it though. I've wanted it longer than she has. I've worked harder than she has. Yet here she is, getting it all handed to her on a silver platter. It's just not fair.

I quickly met Ashton, Michael, and Calum backstage as we all tuned our instruments and whatever else needed done to prepare. We don't have any pre show rituals or anything. In fact, as people we aren't even that close. Outside of practice or band stuff we never speak. Once in a while I talk to Ashton. Since we were friends before the band and all. Even when we're about to go on stage, we never say anything. It's always an awkward silence taking over the air.

I want it to be different, but I don't know if I could become close with Calum again. He is apart of the band as well. He really gets on my nerves. If he wasn't in the band, I'd never look at him ever again. But of course he was the only bass player I knew of, and he's pretty darn good at it. I'm not even gonna lie.

"Guys, we really need to hangout more. Get to know eachother better. It's honestly effecting the band in a way that has nothing to do with the music. If we ever develop fans, they're going to notice how we aren't laughing with each other or posting funny videos of us hanging out. Even how we act on stage you could tell we're only in it for the music. I feel like we could be better as a band if we're better as friends as well." Ashton spoke my mind clearly. Everyone's expressions changed.

Calum's face wore a look of humor. As if he found the whole situation hilarious.

Michael's face wore a look of regret. As if Ashton's words really got under his skin. Almost like he agrees, and wants to help bring the band closer.

As for Ashton, his face wore a look of pleading. He desperately wanted us to agree with him.

My thoughts were soon inturpted by the sound of Calum's voice.

"Who cares if we're friends outside of the band? I don't care to get to know any of you. I already had the displeasure of knowing Luke at a time, and I wouldn't want to go there again. This isn't some sappy cliché fairytale, Ashton. This is the real world where people will do anything for the fame. And this happens to be what I'm doing. Hate to say it, but I, using you fools." He smirked.

"You know what Calum, why don't you just shut the fuck up? You'd be nowhere without us, you do know that right? Stop acting like you're such a superior when you aren't." Michael snapped for the first time.

Michael never seemed to talk much, the most out of all of us. Once and a while Ashton and Calum would bicker over the little things, but Michael had always kept his mouth shut. It seems like he had kept all of his opinions bottled up, and now they are coming out. I don't blame him. Calum finally pushed him off the edge.

"I agree. Don't you care about the fans, Calum? Without them we'd be nothing. You can't have fame without the fans. You do know that, right? They'll und up hating you if you act like that." Ashton scoffed, folding his arms across his chest. Calum raised a brow, fixing his gaze on me.

"What about you, Lukey? What are your thoughts on this?" I gulped.

I've been like Michael. I haven't really expressed my feelings much either. I'm the type of person to stay out of situations such as this one. It's not really my scene. Sure I'll tell Calum off if he gets on my nerves, but usually I ignore him.

"I think your selfish." I simply said. A smirk came across his face.

"Selfish. That's all you got?" He burst out laughing.

"Simple, but effective." My eyes pierced into his.

"Whatever. Have fun with your whole 'friendship' thing, guys. Cause I'll have no part in it." He laughed coldly.

"Yes you will, or you'll be out of the band. At least act like you like us to the camera. On stage, come up to us and smile or something. Do something you'd do with a friend. Just act the part for the fans, or you're out." Ashton declared, Michael and I nodding afterwards.

"Fine." Calum snarled.

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august 24th, 2015, 1:10am

-b