I hate you hemmings ➳ l.h

36

Clarissa's POV

There's no such thing as happiness. You can't expect yourself to be at a good point for too long; it'll just be ripped away from your grasp before you can speak of it. This accident has been a tragedy, yes. However, I couldn't be more grateful for it happening. If it hadn't taken place, I wouldn't understand what I now know. Happiness isn't something you should consider for yourself. It's not an option. The word is filled with constant tragedies waiting to destroy you. Leaving you with nothing but a broken mindset.

No, I don't believe in depression. It's not something I think can be a label, just as happiness isn't. I believe it's just a thing called life. You're either having a good day, an okay day, or a terrible day. I don't believe in happiness or depression because it sounds like a permanent label. You're depressed. You're happy. See, it just doesn't work like that. You aren't just one of them. I like to think they both come together in the middle. I don't know what to call it, but maybe it doesn't need a label. Life would be a lot easier if people stopped labeling everything. Sort of like the high school reputations; the jocks, the nerds, the loners, the mean girls, the wanna-be populars, the nobody's, the freaks, the outcasts, the list goes on and on. I find it absolutely ridiculous that you have to be fitted into a category. However, it's just something that can't be stopped. You automatically categorize everyone you see, without meaning to do so. You can't tell me you've never looked at someone and said wow, they must be a jock. Or wow, look at that group of outcasts. It's normally not something you're proud of. It just happens, it's uncontrollable. You can't help but wonder what other people see you as also. Are you an outcast too? Are you a wanna-be popular? These thoughts linger throughout your mind, whether it being unintended or not. This, my friends, is called society.

The beeps of the monitors went off quite often, snapping me out of my thoughts here and there. Being in a hospital isn't exactly what I expected. Then again, when do you ever expect what happens to you? What would the roller coaster of life be without a good ol' surprise? The ups wouldn't be nearly as enjoyable without the downs.

I heard a faint knock on the door of the hospital room, expecting to be Luke. He's been visiting me non-stop. Not that I don't enjoy his company. I just wish he'd focus more on himself and his own career rather than me. I'm honestly just fine physically, I don't need him to watch over me every second like he thinks. I'm almost positive every second he's not with me, he's thinking about me. No, not thinking about me, worrying about me in particular.

He's got a lot ahead of him. He needs to put forth his best effort instead of giving as little as possible so he can spend the rest of his energy worrying about me. I just wish he'd realize I'm a big girl and I can handle myself. I'm not five years old, I don't need constant babysitting. I can tell his band mates are getting fed up with it as well. You can see it on the scowls covering their faces when they practice.

The ever so familiar man in a white coat appeared once again, this time with a wide smile across his face.

"Ms. Winters, I'm happy to inform you you're free to leave. We'll have your wheel chair here any second now." He told, and I let out a sigh of relief. I couldn't be more ready to get out of here. Maybe Luke won't worry as much with me out of the hospital.

"Great. I'm ready to leave straight away," I beamed, and he just chuckled lightly.

A wheel chair was soon rolled into the room. My eyes almost popped out of my head. I just took into realization that I will have to wheel around in that thing for an entire month. Kill me now.

I groaned as I was lowered into the chair. I'm dreading this already. My mom took the back of the handles with a smile, pushing me out of the room. The sympathy she had for me was evident in her teddy bear brown eyes.