Gone, Never Coming Back

Chapter 31

Summer's POV:
The next day.

I walked into our house.
Our dull lifeless house without Ali-Nooh.
I walked into the dining room.
The candles I lit were now just short stubs of wax, still burning.
I blew them out and took 2 of the stubs.

I took them upstairs and put them in my memory box.
I started to write a long diary of precious moments with him and I kept that in my box so I never forget.
I'll never forget.

Apparently he had been getting me flowers when he crashed so I took one of the flowers and put it in my box. I looked at the box my engagement ring was in all that time ago.

And of course, a ribbon that was tied around a chair at Aniqa's engagement because that's where I fell in love with him.

Then, I took the pictures of us at the park, the swing incident, restaurants and our selfies.
We looked so happy.
We were so happy.

My family came round to tell me the funeral dates.
I just stared at our window seat when my Mum told me it was next week.
I knew I would just be distraught and cry.
Yet all the tears on the world won't take away my pain.

His parents were organising it.
I can't. My Mum held me close and whispered
"Baby, time's a great healer. You'll be fine. He was good man, may Allah grant him a place in Jannah." Then, they went and I wandered around our house like a ghost.

1 week later

The funeral just finished.
Afterwards, I looked around for everyone else's faces. Everyone was crying. His Mum was sobbing, his Dad not doing anything, his friends saying bye.

I can't say bye. Because he's not gone. My husband is not gone.
I couldn't see him as his Dad decided it should be a closed coffin but I just told his body under the coffin how much I love him.

Then, I went home and watched the life around me go on.
Cars passing, the sun going down. Everything stayed the same.
The world went on.
But I couldn't go on.
Not without him.

Aniqa came, desperate to try and comfort me. I sobbed into her shoulder.
"I miss him."
"I know." She said softly.
"What if the twins are like him? What if they're a reminder of my dead soulmate?"

"They will be a reminder. Of the man you love. He'll always be alive to you. You'll see him in your children. It's a gift to still have a living piece of him. His offspring." She said trying to comfort me.
I hadn't thought about it like that.
"In 6 weeks, I'll have him in our children." I said carefully. She nodded and I gave a weak smile.

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