Ch. 46 - First Love

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Dear Mimi,

You have no idea how much I miss you, how much I wish I could go back and redo what happened in highschool. If only you could see me now, I really have changed, I don't let people step all over me anymore, I don't blush as much anymore unless I'm thinking of you and I've got a line of girls chasing after me even though none of them could ever compare to you.

This was what you wanted from me wasn't it, I was too much of a nice guy for you?

A bad boy is what you wanted wasn't it?

I wish I knew, I wish we didn't part ways and I wish I could hold and kiss you in my arms again.

You changed your number, started traveling across the world to start your modeling career after highschool, you're so unreachable for me now, but I guess you always were even when we were together.

I wasn't good enough for you but I promise you that I am now.

I'd do anything to have you back again.

I swallowed the lump forming in my throat, biting my lip as I turned the page over and picked up another letter Harry had written to my sister.

Dear Mimi,

Counting the days are pointless when they all seem to be endless without you here with me.

You don't know how many times I've tried to lose myself with other women, to try and stop thinking about you for one second in bed but I can't, because when I'm pleasuring them all I can think about is how I wish they were you.

I shook my head, closing my eyes for a brief moment trying to contain my emotions as I took in a shakey breath, putting that letter to the side knowing I couldn't finish reading that.

I moved on to the next paper, knowing that with each sentence, each word he wrote down my heart was slowly breaking away piece by piece with each syllable but my curiousity was overpowering the torture my mind and heart was going through at the moment.

Once I was sure I wasn't going to cry I picked up the next page.

I didn't know you had a sister.

She's in my English class, I overheard the teacher call her, you two have the same last name.

I looked her up just to make sure, did some stalking on her social media.

Natalie Kaufman.

She's my opportunity, your sister is my chance to find and get back to you Mimi.

I won't mess this up.

I pursed my lips, swallowing as I flipped to the next letter with shaking hands.

It hurt so much more when I could hear his voice in my head saying these exact words.

Your sister... she's a bit, different from you that's for sure.

She brought me into a tattoo shop and I overheard her talk to some friends when she thought I was unconscious.

I found out your sister Natalie is using me as inspiration for a story she's writing which I don't mind, it'll be a mutual relationship, she'll use me for her story and I'll use her to get back to the woman I want to be with for the rest of my life... and that will forever be you Mimi.

When I get close enough to Natalie, I'll see you again and I won't let you leave me this time.

I'll keep you in my arms, and if you still love me as much as I still love you, I'll take your hand in marriage and never let you go.

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