Today I Dont Feel Like Doing Anything

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The next day, I wake up to the loud sound of birds chirping. As the morning grouch I am, I steal a frying pan from the kitchen and murder the noisy birds with it. I shut my window and fall back into my bed. As I sunk into my slumber once more, a rib-crushing pain on my back occurs. My eyes flash open to Maka sitting on my back happily. I smile slighty, but im still mad at those birds. "Wakey wakey!" she chirps hapilly and skips out of my room. I groan and roll off the bed, landing face-first on the hardware floor. "Ow."

After some time, i change into an over sized basketball shirt and black sport shorts. I walkdown one step them tumble the rest of my way down. Maka and Soul looks at mein concerns, but I walk it off like it was normal. "Maaakaaa..." I growled while I walked to the table. "What?" I look at the waffles on the plate in front of me, the smashed my face into it. Soul and Make laughs as I eat my food. Screw you guys. "Kanji, you forgot the syrup." Before I could look up, my head was already coated in maple syrup. It was cold as hell, but it felt good though. "Mmmmmmm." I said sarcastically.

It sounded like whip cream coming out of the can after that. Mostly, Mama would do that for fun. "And with a cherry on top." I was too damn tired to rampage on them, so I stayed in place. After a few minutes or so, I lifted y head, but the plate was still on my face. Three squeaks sounded like it was on my face, or the plate, then a snap of a camera. "I swaer to God, if you-"

"Aaaand posted!" Soul laughed. Fuck my life in the mouth. I grab the plate and slowly pull it off my face. It came off fine, but the waffles stayed. I did the same and I found my face in front of a mirror. Syrup covered ever nook and cranny of my face, I had whip cream in my head.....with a cherry on top. I slowly turn to Maka and Soul, who were giggling like they were high and sighed. "This should give me a good reason to kill you both in your sleep." I walk upstairs to the bathroom and undress myself. "Don't fall asleep on the toilet naked again!"

"Shut up, Maka!" I whined. I turn on the shower, and make the water super fricken hot for me. I start to wash the crap out my hair, but it was so relaxing. I endednup dozing off, until the water went fucking Jack Frost on me.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!"

I hear Soul laughing evilly and I scream more. It was so. Fucking. COLD. "WHY'D YOU  DO THIS TO MEEEE?! ITS SO FUCKING COLD!!! MY LIPS ARE PUCKERING, MY NIPPLES ARE ALL WRINKLED BECAUSE OF YOU, SOUL!!! WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO YOU'RE OWN FRIEEEEEEEEND!!" I hop out the shower, but the shower curtain falls on me.

"THIS IS THE WORST. FUCKING. DAY. EVER!!!"

Hours Later

Islowuched on couch in front of the TV, thinking about my parents. I wonder what they were like before they died. What would me life be like of I still had them? Would I have even met Maka if they were still around? Heh, probably my not. I stench of syrup and soap, and I don't care. Just for once, I'd like to not have any thoughts about anything. I went back to my freezing room and took the box out. I wanted to eat them so badly, but I just couldn't. Maybe.....one lick wouldnt hurt. I take the chance without a second thought. So smooth....sweet...dEvOURrr...

I jump back and looked around. I could've sworn that the voice was right in front of me. It must've been that again. Oh well, that won't be coming back anytime soon. I put them back and slide the box under my bed. I lay on the fluffy comforter and sigh. What if Maka finds out about the souls I've hidden? How would she react? My thoughts were cut off by a loud pop from behind me. I quickly turn to see a price of a popped balloon fly into my face. "DAMN IT, SOUL!!" I hear his evil laughs echo ilon the first floor. I look around for him, but he isn't in any of the rooms. Once I come out, I see something in the corner of my eye.

My fingers quickly turned into blades and the kishin symbols showed on my face once I quickly turned to it. It was Maka wearing outside clothing with a basket ball in her hands. "AH!!" We said in unison. Maka stumbles backwards and I just slip and fall on my ass. "Kanji? You okay?" Mama asks. I stay there on the floor, not moving an inch. "You guys have been total dicks today." I said bluntly.

"Today's opposite day."

"WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUU-"

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