Poison (discontinued)

21

Rose's POV


"Sh, you'll wake her!" A muffled voice pulls me from my sleep. I blink a few times before fully opening my eyes. The room surrounding me is unfamiliar and that scares me. Where am I?!

"It's twelve o'clock! Just wake her up already!" Another voice replies. I can't quite place the accent. British? Maybe Irish?

"I already told you I'm not doing that. I'm looking after her and being a pest and waking her up is not included in that." Is that Harry's voice? It must be. The last thing I remember is him driving me home. But he obviously didn't drive me home so where am I?

I ignore the voices from outside and crawl out of bed to explore the room. The desk is covered in books and scattered pieces of paper. I scan through them surprised to see so many good books. I wonder who's room this is? The bookshelf catches my attention so I make my way over to it. Resting on the shelf at my eye level is a photo. I instantly recognize myself as a child and Harry next to me. His curls are a lot more defined and his smile is huge.

I don't want to face Harry and whoever else is outside this room yet so I return to the desk and take a seat. I hope Harry doesn't mind but I scan through some of the pieces of paper. They seem like song lyrics. I didn't know Harry wrote songs.

I pick one piece of paper up and read it specifically. I don't know the melody or if these are even song lyrics but I make up a tune in my head as I read.

One day you'll come into my world and say it all
You say we'll be together even when you're lost
One day you'll say these words
I've thought but never said
You say we're better off together in our bed
I want you here with me
Like how I pictured it
So I don't have to keep imagining

Come on, jump out at me
Come on, bring everything
Is it too much to ask for something great?
Come on, jump out at me
Come on, bring everything


"Morning," Harry greets me as he opens the door. "Hey! What do you think you're doing?!" He snatches the paper from my hand and shoves it in his back pocket before rapidly moving all the other papers in the top draw of his desk. "That was private!"

"Sorry," I shrug. I don't really feel like apologizing to him when I still haven't even forgiven him. I don't want to be here right now. In fact he is the last person I want to be with. "I'm gonna go."

"Wait, no, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have spoken to you like that. Let me make you breakfast." The desperation in his eyes is evident.

"No thank you," I politely decline his offer. I just want to get out of here. I search the room for my shoes and pull them on as soon as I find them. I scoot past Harry in the doorway. "Goodbye."

"C'mon, at least let me drive you home. It's too far to walk." I contemplate his words. I don't want to have to face the awkward conversation that is sure to come in the car but I don't want to walk home either.

"Fine. But that's it." I leave him behind in his room. I find the boy the Irish accent must belong to. "Hi, I'm Rose."

"I'm Niall," he introduces himself. His blonde hair is flowing in no particular direction with strands flying off in all different ways. His baggy white singlet suits him showing off his toned arms.

"Well, it was nice to meet you. See you later!" I wave and walk down a hall to where I hope the front door is.

"Rose," Harry calls from behind. "Front doors this way." My cheeks burn red. Oh well, I've done much worse than this in my 19 years. I follow him to his car and climb in the passenger seat.

Harry starts the car and we sit in silence for a while. I don't like this silence. It's awkward and uncomfortable. At least for me it is anyway so I reach forward and turn the radio on. I can feel Harry's eyes on my as he takes his eyes off the road for a spilt second. I ignore him and look out the window humming the song playing softly to myself.

"Look Rose, I don't expect you to forgive me any time soon but I just want you to know how sorry I am." Harry's hands fidget on the steering wheel. I can see how anxious he is when he runs his left hand through his hair.

"I don't want to talk about it." This news has left me numb inside. It hurt so much when he told me but I'm
not angry anymore. I can't say I'm happy and I can't say I'm pissed off. I'm sad yes but not in the usual crying manner. I feel as if someone has just sucked every happy memory and feeling I've ever had from me leaving only my most horrid thoughts inside. I feel numb.

"Okay," he nods slowly and doesn't say a word for the rest of our journey. Minutes feel like hours until we finally pull up on the curb out the front of my apartment building.

"Thanks for the ride." I don't bother to wait for a reply and jump out of the car and heading straight for my apartment. Once I'm inside I scurry around until I find what I'm looking for. My childhood photo album.

I flick through pages and pages of photos of Harry and I, my dad and my family and even photos of my first pet. I smile at some of the memories brought back by these photos but can't help the gut wrenching feeling inside at the images of my dad. Even some of the photos with Harry tug at my memories from last night and that horrendous day so many years ago. I have to stop torturing myself like this so I grab my phone to call mum.

"Hey sweetie!" Mum calls through the phone.

"Hey mum," I flop down on my bed staring up at the ceiling. I'm not sure what to talk about with her. I really just want to talk to her and cry to her on the phone but I won't. I'm not going to put her through how I'm feeling right now. "How are you?"

"Good thanks sweetie! I went on another date with Gary and I think things might be getting serious! You're okay with that right?" She asks searching for approval. I'm glad to see she's moving on with life and found someone who can make her happy.

"Of course I am! I'm glad to hear that. I'll have to come home and meet him soon." I'd use any excuse at the moment to go home. I don't want to have to see the reason for my dad's passing every day. I don't want to just bump into him on campus and have a breakdown. I can't do this.

"You're welcome anytime! How about we go for dinner next week? Bring a boy and we can make it a double date!" She sounds excited about her own idea. That does sound nice but I don't know who I'd bring. I mean I could ask Louis but we're strictly friends and I don't know how El would feel about that and I don't want to ask Harry. Being in the same room as him and my mother with mum not knowing what he did would be torture.

"Sure," I smile even though she can't see me. "That sounds nice."

"Great! Well I hate to keep this so short but I have to get to work. I'll text you details later. See you next weekend! I love you." She rushed to end the call.

"Bye mum. Love you too." I get in just before she hangs up. It was good to hear we voice again.

I rub my eyes after stretching out on the bed. I can't help pulling my photo album from the floor and onto the bed in front of me. I gently slide my thumb back and forth over one photo in particular. The memory it brings back fills me with joy.

It was from when I was about eight and Harry was nine. My arms are wrapped around his torso and his around my waist. Harry's looking directly at the camera, his cheeks bright red and my lips are squished against Harry's cheeks with his curly hair flopping on my face. I remember this day almost as if it was yesterday.


~ flashback ~


"Do you want to play?" Harry asks when I answer the door. I love playing with Harry. He's funny.

"Yes please. Let me ask mum." I leave him at the open doorway and wander to the kitchen to find mum. "Mummy, can I please go play with Harry?"

"Of course sweetie but you know the rules, you mustn't leave this block. Why didn't you invite him in Rosie? Where are your manners?" She rambles on. "Bring him inside, I've got cookies."

"Harry!" I yell as I skip down the hall. "Mums got cookies for us!" His smile widens and we race each other to the kitchen bench.

"I win!" Harry rubs it in my face.

"I wasn't racing!" I lie not wanting to accept the loss. I reach for the cookies on the bench and take two, both for myself.

"Yes you were!" Harry argues taking a bite from the cookie in his hand. He makes a funny noise at how good they taste and I laugh.

"Let's go outside!" I use my outside voice. That's what mum calls it. She says we have an inside and an outside voice. I grab Harry by the arm and tug him outside.

"What do you want to play?" He asks me. I think about his question for a while.

"Um, let's play catch and kiss!" This games funny. It freaks me out too though. I don't want to catch cooties from him. Gross!

"Fine but you're in!" He yells and runs away. I'm a lot faster than Harry but he's smarter and trickier.

"I'm gonna get you!" I squeal and round the corner of my house. He's almost at the front of my house. I can catch him. He's going to run around the corner and that's when I'll be able to catch up.

I speed up losing my breath and just miss him as we both round the corner. My fingers just nip the back of his shirt. He jumps onto the veranda and runs across until he reaches the other side of the house and turns down towards the backyard. I decide to try and be tricky and run through the house. I run past mum who's holding a camera but pay no attention to it. I smash through the backdoor and Harry yells when he sees how close I am.

"Gotcha!" I scream when my arms wrap around him. I slam my lips against his cheek and hear a click as a flash shines in my eyes. I let go of Harry and wipe my mouth on the back of my hand. "Gross."

~ flashback over ~

How can someone who made me so happy be the reason for my nightmares. He made the best years of my life but also made the worst. How is that even possible? I know for a fact I can't hate him but there's no way I will ever be able to be friends with him again. I don't think I'll ever forgive him and if I do he's going to work his but off for it.

I need to clear my head. Thankfully I grabbed my board last time I went to visit mum so I throw on a pair of swimmers and chuck my wetsuit into the back of my car. My dad taught me to surf. We used to go out almost every afternoon for him to give me lessons. Then I started to go out on my own once he died and I taught myself from there. I used to dream of becoming a pro surfer but things change.

The drive to the beach doesn't take long due to the lack of traffic on the roads. I pull up in the small car park and squeeze into my tight wetsuit. I grab my board and run to where the waves are pounding. The sound of the waves crashing onto the shore relaxes me. I think it's the familiarity of the sea that does it actually. The water feels incredible around my feet and I dive onto my board to paddle out.

I could not have asked for a better break. The waves are amazing as I ride towards shore then paddle back out. I slip off my board and into the water making sure my board stays close by the ankle rope strapped to my leg. How anyone could hate the sea I'll never know. I duck my head under a wave resurfacing only to catch my breath. My dad used to say I was a fish or a mermaid in another life. I think that would be pretty cool.






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AUTHOR'S NOTE: I thought this was a nice way to end this chapter. It was relaxing to write :) Anyway, please keep reading because there's plenty more drama to come! (Remember the first chapter?) Thank you so much for voting on the last chapter. Please share this story around with as many people as possible because the more readers there are the faster I want to update! Also I'm starting to work on another fanfic and I want to know which boy you want it to be with! I was thinking Niall or Liam but I'm happy to write about whoever just tell me who you'd prefer! Since the last chapter got 3 votes so quickly this time I'll update when this chapter gets 5 votes! Again thank you so much for reading you guys are awesome! I'd love to hear your feedback so please comment. Have a good day xx