Watch N' Learn 2

Chapter 49

Chapter 49

Ezra

Everybody has there way of dealing with things and I got mine. I regret the shit I did to Zoe a few days ago so I just left the crib. I can't look at her and the shit is embarrassing.

I'm all over social media about having domestic abuse charges and Giselle calling me a dead beat dad to the blogs but I just can't deal with shit right now so I've been shutting everybody out. The wrong people actually.

I've cut myself off from the world for the past four days. I been high as fuck and drinking like crazy. Mane my mind fucked up and I'm not even looking for sympathy shit at this point I don't blame Zoe if she want to go through with the divorce because I have been treating her like shit. I'm not asking her to forgive me for putting my hands on her because I shouldn't have went home like that in the first place.

It may seem like shit all good but it's not. I ain't gonna lie I was flirting hella hard with ol girl from work but I never stepped out on Zoe like that. But I mean she can take it how she want to.

I knew I needed to go home and talk to Bella but I just felt like shit looking at her. I don't understand why she even still here dealing with this shit situation of mines.

I threw my sweats and hoodie on making sure the hood was on my head and left out of the hotel room I was in. I got my car from valet and went home.

I wanted to light up a blunt before I got to the crib but decided against it because I lowkey haven't been completely sober in almost a week and a half. I've been fucked up. I haven't even talked to my friends, shit is crazy.

When I got home and walked in, Zoey was in the kitchen making herself lunch I guess. She completely froze once she saw me and I saw her body tense up. I walked towards her and she was very hesitant and nervous.

"I'm not gonna hit you." I told her.

I was pissed about seeing that shit with Kyron but he don't phase me.

"Where have you been?" She asked.

"Sit down and let's talk." I said pulling a seat out for her then sitting at the table also.

I'm assuming the baby was somewhere sleeping because he wasn't here this time. Zoey slowly sat down then stared at me.

"What's up?" She spoke softly.

"I just want to apologize to you...for everything. I'm truly sorry Zoe. I'm not asking you to accept my apology. If you want to go and get divorced, then we'll do it. I know shit been hard..." I said looking at her.

"You think I want to divorce the only man I've ever been in love with?" She asked.

"Zoey I been real fucked up lately and I wasn't trying to hurt you intentionally. I've never dealt with some of the shit I've been going through lately."

"E, we were best friends before anything. We tell each other everything. I'm your wife. What's going on? Have you cheated & feel guilty now? I mean what is it?" Zoey said.

"Nah...I haven't cheated on you. I flirted a few times with the girl at work but I haven't slept with anyone. I haven't been in the mood for that." I explained.

"Is it Giselle calling you a terrible father?"

A lump grew in my throat when she said that and I could feel myself about to lose it. Fuck I need a blunt.

"Maybe we should talk later. I can't do this right now. I thought I could but nah I'm good." I said standing.

I had to go light one up before I flipped out on her again. It's the only thing keeping me calm these days.

Zoey grabbed my hand. "Tell me what's wrong."

"Nah Zoe, I'm good."

"Ezra..."

"Zoey please stop."

"Is it me?" She asked pulling away from me.

I sighed. Fuck. I can't do this shit right now. I really can't. I don't know why I fucking came back here.

"No Zoe!" I said raising my voice a bit.

"Then what is it Ezra? What is it?" She asked raising her voice also.

"Kayla got cancer!" I yelled at her.

Her mouth dropped and she just stared at me.

Fuck!

Zoey

His daughter with Giselle has cancer. What the fuck!

I walked towards him and he pushed me away.

"Nah, stop." He said.

"I'm so sorry Ezra. How is she doing? Have you seen her?" I asked.

"She dying Zoe what the fuck do you mean how she doing?! She fucking dying. I don't want to see that shit. I don't." He yelled.

Tears formed in my eyes watching the hurt in his. This is why Giselle has been talking down on him.

"You have to go see her E, I'm sure she is wishing you were there. She probably thinks you don't care about her. What if she leaves right now and you haven't been there? You're gonna deal with that for the rest of your life. You get on a airplane and you go see her Ezra. You're being selfish, that's your baby girl."  I told him.

I knew he wanted to break down maybe even cry but he was trying to hold it all together. He was breaking.

"I'm not going to see her like that again." He said.

"She needs you." I said above a whisper.

"I can't fucking do it Zoe. It's not shit I can do sitting there watching her sit in the fucking hospital bed helpless. No amount of fucking money is able to fix this shit and it's fucked up. That's a fucking child." He said.

I wanted to hold him and just hug him tight but he wasn't having it. I know he wanted to break down and cry but I guess his pride just wouldn't let him. He wanted to be a man but men cry.

"It's okay to cry E." I told him.

He put his hood over his head and walked out the door slamming it. God, what am I supposed to do now?

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