Lashton one Shots

Insecure

Prompt: Luke and Ashton have been dating for a little over a year now. And they couldn't be happier with each other. Well, almost...

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Ashton stared at his reflection and grimaced. His arms were too flabby, his thighs were too big, he was gaining weight. He hated it. He hated himself. All ashton saw in himself was failure. He's not attractive. He's not hot. He's not sexy. What he saw when he looked at himself was just plain ugliness. He doesn't understand how he has a boyfriend or what Luke saw in him when he was so ugly and fat.

Ashton shook his head and reached into the vanity drawer and pulled out a small razor blade. He brought the small  blade to his wrist and drug it across his skin. Ashton had silent tears rolling down his cheeks. He backed up until he hit the wall and slid down onto the floor.

Ashton still had the blade in his hand and he once again brought it to his wrist. He drug it across his skin another time before he heard the front door open.

"Babe?" Luke called out from downstairs.  Ashton's eyes widened, he thought that Luke wouldn't back home till later, but obviously he was wrong.

"Ash?" Ashton could hear Luke's footsteps coming up the stairs, and yet he made no effort to move. He just sat on the bathroom floor until Luke finally found him.

"A-ash? Oh my god. C'mere." Luke said as once as he opened the door. He came to see Ashton sitting on the floor, razor in hand, and blood flowing off his wrist.

Luke scrambled to the floor to Ashton and pulled him into his embrace.

"I'm sorry." Ashton mumbled through the tears that started to flow from his eyes.

"Shh, hey it's ok. Hold on." Luke said reaching up onto the counter and grabbed a towel that just happened to be there. He pressed it gently to Ashton's wrist and held Ashton close.

"Why Ashton?" Luke asks him once he stops crying.

"Why do you like me?" Ashton responds, not looking at Luke

"What did you mean why do I like you?" Luke asked confused. "Why do you like me? I'm ugly, I'm fat, I'm weak, I'm a waste of time. I'm nothing but worthless. So why do you like me? Why are dating me? You can do so much better." Ashton mumbled. Luke stared at the small fragile boy in his arms.

"Come on Ash. Let's get you cleaned up." Luke said after a few minutes. He helped Ashton up from the floor, Ashton didn't protest. He let Luke take him over to the sink and wash his arms. Luke then bandaged his wrist and pushed Ashton till his back was against the counter.

"Now," Luke said. "Why do you're ugly and fat? Because you're not."

"Yes I am. I am fat. Look at my stomach," Ashton motioned to his stomach, "It's all chubby and fat and I hate it. My arms are too skinny, my thighs are too big. I hate the way I look. My eyes are ugly, the color is disgusting, my lips are always chapped , my cheeks are too fat, my dimples are too deep and big. It's just so ugly."

Luke stared at his lover in shock. He never knew Ashton felt this way about himself. "You're welcome to be disgusted with me and leave, it's ok. I'll understand." Ashton said, getting ready to walk away from Luke but he kept him in place.

Luke came in close to Ashton's face. Ashton could feel Luke's breath on his lips.

"Why didn't you ever tell me you felt this way? I could've proved you wrong a long time ago." Ashton looked at him with confusion.

Luke tilts his head down a little and the side, "First of all, your stomach isn't fat. It's perfect. I love your stomach. I love how you're so ticklish there," Luke lightly pokes stomach causing Ashton to let out a small giggle. Luke smiled, "I love placing kisses on your stomach. It's not chubby, it's not fat, it's cute. Suits you. And your thighs. I love your thighs. They are not 'to big'," Luke grips Ashton's thighs from behind, causing Ashton so gasp. "Your thighs are beautiful, not to big, not to small, just right. Sure they are thick, but that just makes them better. Now your arms. They are not skinny, they have a lot of muscle." Luke stops and puts Ashton's arms around his neck.